A Very Depressing Blog

Dear Blog thingy,

Hey this is me, Alora...Lately I have had a rough week but also a good one. The weekend was very long and short to me also...
Blake and Angie slept in my room for 2 days and it was so hard not sleeping in my bed. But it was either Mikayla’s bed or the downstairs couch. And sleeping on the couch wasn’t so hot because you could hear Blake’s loud laugh clear as day all the way downstairs! I kept waking up in the middle of the day, and then who knew it was 10:00 am, and it was time to get up anyway for church...

Not that I didn’t have fun with our company it’s just that I’m used to peace and quiet but when they come over. There’s neither. I mean I love Jayla to death, but it’s that she’ll cry at the drop of a hat for NO REASON AT ALL! Yesterday she cried for over an hour because she thought Moriah hated her. -_0
...Oh boy...
And for over an hour Moriah had to keep saying she didn’t hate her...
Wow Jayla...
I had driver’s training everyday so that keeps me busy and driving ALL the time; I drive home, to and from Driver’s Ed...And whenever else that they try to make me drive...I thought I’d never say this but, I kind of hate driving now, I’d rather just ride...
Every time I come to youth service and I take a gander at all the guys, I just mutter to myself...’I miss Jordan.’ It feels so self-centered when I think that, but it’s true. I need him, he just does everything that no one can give me...And somehow he manages to make me feel like a princess, like no one in the world exists...but me. ^_^ And a bonus **Dude he’s totally in church!**

I can and can’t wait till camp...I mean my parents are going to be there, which means no hanging out with any hot guys...ever...so I might as well forget it...Every guy is afraid of my dad, it’s just normal...sadly...
I guess I can handle being alone I mean I didn’t expect Koty to like me...at all. Or Dawan, or Maurice but they did. I just pictured Jordan finally telling me that he likes me and we fall in love but promise to wait till were 18 to date (since we both aren’t allowed). But instead, I was snagged by a hot guy and things didn’t really turn out well. But they had a happy ending. Later at my house, he gave me hints the whole night but finally told me on the phone, that he liked me. I was relieved. But I no longer liked him after seeing the jerkiest side of him at camp towards Koty...
Now after venting all that I realized that maybe I don’t want Jordan I just want someone to bring happiness back into my life. I’m tired of being this plastic Barbie doll (and the body to go with it x_x) that’s always smiling. I used to wonder if anyone realized something was wrong with me. But Jordan always knew. I could have a smile on and he’d ask what’s wrong...he knows me...yeah...he knows me...that’s all that matters...and that’s all I need.