Letters To A Binding Past

Dear Past Which Enthralls,

Since the life I've left, with footsteps, impressed behind...I've made sure never again, to hurt anyone, by being selfless to an extent, intangible, by accepting the nature of our humanity, forgivingly, with nothing in mind to be redeemed, known as revenge, by loving everyone for their unique talents, to be through me, timelessly never envied...and by embracing differentiability, as flaws, known by society...I've made sure to have become as much as I may be, a being of chastity and a heart blooming purity...I've done it all so naturally, within a quest for divinity....I've given my life in helping everyone that I can, so this world could in turn, more peaceful be... If people would, my wishes for all living beings, only emulate...For a time of ageless streams drifting through tranquility...ever so immaculate...Intoxicated upon life itself in peace...I live for the hateful, live for the hopeful..I live for all...Yet I live it all, my life for me, the way I want...For myself...And this is how I choose to live, to love everyone...How I chose to live...So until I will wholly be satisfied with the life I've led, so much that I would gladly smile at my time of death, until then, I will live for none, accompanied by no wish to help anyone but myself...Such is an age that has already been decayed...and until I will find someone to whom I could truly be dedicated and give my life to, someone who would reverse the deathly satisfaction from the life of which, is sorrowfully my own...Someone to live for...Someone to die for...Someone who would make me want to remain breathing, within this stark world...So I could in return, take my life and at her feet, writhe, begging her to will me as she pleases, as to never be anything less than everything within her eyes...Suffer for her so she never may, the way many have, before me felt, within my shame, of a distanced time, yet such as not so long ago...And so, until then I would live for myself helping others...Now I live for me and her...I've helped strangers as they've passed, shown the world what I could be, proven that souls can, for the best, may change, even if it only, in strange ways seems to be...I have lived for others, bent myself to forgive my past forever, to be what I am today...Such as I am beloved in her heart, solace through caresses, in her eyes I see, resonating, this figure once lost now, a lover, bound to her arms through all time, cherished...As is she...So I have lived for myself, lived for the desire to twist a reality...Bleakly so humane...Into a reverie...A world such as this could never be...I knew this yet my open arms I have held...In futility? No...But in hopes that, rippling in effect, a drop of water I could be...And to this day, I have lived for my sole enamor...I have lived in searching for the one, and now I live for, to give my self, my life, to her and her alone....I have lived through my rebirth.....Lived to one day be forgiven for who ever I may have been in times, long lost within a memory...So once AGAIN...I have lived for my own, for this world, and now for one alone...But this day I ask of you, as I, myself have done, to grant me the gift of living my life, forgiven...As to relieve me of this poison, the shameful toxin, once known in my heart...An artifact from ages of hallowed creatures, crucified...Now lays shattered, within, piercing me, my flesh, splitting wide, you will see...What it is I've come to be...So one final time I'll ask of you, for what I once was and only knew, that you may or someday will, in genuine words.....Forgive what once was me...