Is There an Easter Bunny?

Is There an Easter Bunny?

 

By Jack Rawlins

We take pleasure in answering at once and thus prominently the email below, expressing at the same time our gratification that its faithful author is numbered among our readers:

Dear Mr. Rawlins: I am 8 years old.
Some of my friends say there is no Easter Bunny.
Papa says, "If you see it in WDC it is so."
Please tell me the truth: Is there an Easter Bunny?

Virginia O’Hare

Virginia, your little friends are full of bunny poop. They have been affected by the skepticism of a skeptical age. Yet, they are surrounded by un-reality they blindly accept as real.

Yes, Virginia, there is an Easter Bunny. He exists as certainly as greed, competition and economic opportunity. You know that they abound and give to life all the material stuff you “just gotta have,” that  give to your life its highest beauty and joy and because all the other kids have it.

Alas! How dreary would be the world if there were no Easter Bunny. It would be as dreary as if there were no Virginias, or Sponge Bob Square Pants . There would be no childlike faith then, no poetry, and no romance to make tolerable this existence.

Your little friends could park their tiny heinies in the cold damp grass all night to catch the Easter Bunny, but even if they don’t see him, what would that prove? Nobody sees the Easter Bunny. Can you see the music on your iPod? Of course not. But whenever you want it, it’s there to vibrate your little ear drums on their journey to adolescent deafness.

Nobody can conceive or imagine all the wonders there are unseen and un-seeable in the world: The Internet, cell phones, microwaves, remote controls, Google. Ask your little friends if they are real or if they’ve ever seen any of those mystical things that make them work. And ask them what they know about algorithms, too.

Only faith, fancy, poetry, love, romance, greed and economic incentives can see the big picture. Is it all real?  Ah, Virginia, in this entire world there is nothing else more real and abiding.

No Easter Bunny! Thank God! He lives, and he lives forever. A thousand years from now, Virginia, even  long beyond Y4K, he will continue to make glad the hearts of children, shop keepers, fuzzy- toy manufacturers, laying hens, candy makers and Hallmark.

Editor’s Note : Parody is fun and easy. Genius is not. Please Google and enjoy the genesis [sic] of the above: Yes, Virginia. There is a Santa Claus, by Francis Pharcellus Church.

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