A Temporal Dimension Too Far

Young Timmy sat at his computer chatting with his online mistress, a girlie by the name of Ashley, immersing himself in that mushy, warm, ooey gooey feeling that always took over his cardiac area when her name popped up in his buddy list. Their constant mutterances of "I love my snookum pie" and "How's my sweetie tweetie" amplified the sensation. Suddenly, their conversation took a stomach-dropping turn.

"Timmy..."

"Yes, my lovey dovey?"

"I...I can't do this anymore."

"Wha--What do you mean?"

"You're so far away, and it hurts, and...I can't do it anymore."

"But...But..."

"Goodbye, Timmy. I'll never forget you."

The door slam sound echoed in his head, and her name disappeared.

***

"Mmkay...Looks like he's about ready...Here I go!" Blurkward dived the Negativity Gnome into the third dimension, salivating at the fact that he would soon be tunneling into young Timmy's head and making him feel really bad. The Negativity Gnome resides in the fourth temporal dimension and has dimensions of approximately two feet tall by one foot wide by one and a half feet long by three feet blenk. Spikes covered his body, all aimed slightly in one direction so as to stabilize his dive into the third dimension. Due to his altered perspective on Timmy's world, he could directly enter his skull and manipulate his brain without Timmy feeling a thing. His job was to watch over the four-dimensional world (three temporal and one time...in other words, Timmy's) and tweak with guys' brains when bad things happen in order to make them feel worse. He fed off the resulting positive vibes flowing out from their heads and used the waves to increase his potential energy reserves, much as Ashley eats ice cream, absorbs the chemical energy, and stores it as potential energy in her bottom.

The Negativity Gnome made sure to prevent Timmy from ever seeing Ashley in person, for if he did all the positive energy would flow back into Timmy and kill him.

...Unless, of course, Timmy likes big girls and doesn't know it...

Well, I'm in here already, so let's have a looksie...