a story of true hope =)

"There it was on a cold day Janurary 2nd, 2007"

It had been a really stressful year, highschool, family,
and daily life drama of your adverage teen.
Things were doing ok,
that was until my grandpa got really sick....
He was put in a nursing home for he had very weak knees.

A shock caused my family to freeze their lives and draw
their attention to his!

They over dosed his medicine and he had 2 strokes and
was on a death sentence basically.
I was astonished to see
this happening to me!! My world began to crumble before
my tear filled eyes. I was terrified to lose someone again so
close to my home in my heart. In hope he survived and returned
home but to a different nursing home. I gave thanks to the
heavens for not taking him away. I spent some time with him
watching him get better.

Things were ok for a long while, but then things began to turn
for the worst it could ever get.
He got really sick and had 2 more
strokes, but faithfully he was a strong man and got through. I
was so shocked i could feel my heart joyfully crying inside.
So knowing everything i spent so much time with him, to stay close
and to be near someone i dearly loved most. He began to heal for awhile.

He then around Novemember got really really sick, he was diagnosed with
lung cancer......... shock after shock and i didnt think i could take anymore.
The world began to become cold and crumble at the depths of my feet.
As this went on, i spent as much time with him as possible, he was told
he had a year or less to live.
Then they day before christmas he was sent to
the hospital for beening really deadly sick.

Then the hardest day of my year
and most of my life happened.

Janurary 1rst around 12:00 pm the nursing home called and told my whole
family to come see him, for they thought his poor dear life would be over
during the night. So i went bravely, watching him struggle for air, gasping
to stay on this planet with his family. I layed there at his feet crying and
screaming for this all to stop and for him to be healed.

Then at 3:05 in the morning he had passed.......
I got the call and i couldnt breathe,
right then and there i fell to my knees and screamed at god how this could
happen to me. I wondered why this could happen after everything he had
survived through all the pain and maddness.
So i was not ok to be honest, for two weeks i layed there pretty much life less.

In conclusion i wanted to give up everything , and let my hope flee from my heart and soul. Then i thought about how he lived his life, and how he left a legacy for
me to go and continue on.... he was not a rich man a dime to his name but
always did the best he could in the world as it turned his back on him. so i asked
myself how i could be so selfish to want him to be sick and hurt, i finally felt the
spirit of hope retain back in my body... all was now ok, he made me realize that in this world i want to be like him in a sense.... i want to live my life with no hate or
regret and even without a nickel to my name, still keep up my faith. For if you
give up, what else is there for you to believe in?
I want to be different in the world,
and when its time for me to leave, leave strong with my loved ones by my side..
I want to be able to look in the mirror and tell myself everything will be fine and
know in the end hope is what carried me through it all.......