Thoughts on writing

              As I sit against the blank page in front of me I tremble. "My God" , I think,  "what a great power I possess!". Just consider this - you have your empty space of still unborn words and you are empowered to do everything you want with it. You can make it live, evolve in whatever your imagination is capable of  and... die just like that. And that's scarring, isn't it? Cause power means responsibility and the mere mentionning of this word  frighten most of us out of our wit.
            English is a foreign language to me. This is more than enough a reason to make me quit writing in this wonderful site before I even begin. Every single world or phrase I dare to put down, I have to consider at least twice whether it fits in or not.
            I want to write freely and elegantly but unfotunately I can not. I am limited by my... fears. Fears of being rejected, of being ridiculed, of being told that my dreams are silly and not worth the effort. As you see, it is not only the language inadequacy that hinders my way to "the great literature". In order to make something valuable we MUST crystalize our minds. We must recognize and subdue that little insidious voice in our heads thats says: "Who on earth are you for to want so much? You cannot succeed, cause success is something you do not deserve. People are happy but not you - you should suffer" and so on, and so on.
            Writing means devotion. Devotion means selflessness. Selflessness means love. So writting is love (as by my opinion is everything around us in it's very core). Without love how can a sane man or woman tear away from the white world for so many hours just to do something that by many opinions (of their friends and family) is completely worthless: "Do you really think you can make a living out of writing?!?", "Come on do something serious, leave these childish dreams of yours.". But great people are great because they do not care about this inconsistent background thing called "other peole's opinion". They just don't and follow their own way regardless of it.
              All in all, what makes a good writer? Is it his or her own unique style, his or her vivid imagination or enormous dictionary? In other words - how can we the mortals be like Fitzgherald, Twain, Hammingway, Tolstoi or Dostoevski. Truly a hard question and the answer of it is not simpler. The easiest answer to think of but the hardest  to realize would be simply to write, write, write. Write as much as you can and be not embarrassed by the results and the fierce critique that inevitably follows even the greatest works of art. "Easy" is incompatible with "Dream" and whoever dare follow the last must be prepared for both great moments of unbearable sorrow and great moments of inexplicable joy.