Hello it's me, I'm Sam the Plumber,
Always on call, winter through summer.
I'm there within minutes of your call,
Baggy pants, famous buttcrack and all!
Tell me your problem, I'll know what to do.
I'm sure I can fix it, just like brand new.
Your faucet is dripping, leak at the spout?
"Hand me a wrench", to my helper I shout.
I have all the tools, I'll fix it just right.
I will work non-stop from morning to night.
When I am all finished, I know you'll be pleased.
Your toilets will work, your ice cubes have freezed.
You will be so happy we'll sit and chat,
Talking for hours about this and that.
As the day ends it will be time to go,
I'll pack up my tools and dump out my joe.
On my way out I'll hand you my bill,
Your smile will frown, you'll look kind of ill.
You'll stutter and cringe and become very sour,
As you just realized I make $200.00 an hour!
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