Random Writings 2

Looking down the railroad, he saw the train coming on full speed and he laid down on the tracks with his stale grilled cheese sandwich in his hand. His mind was set and nothing was going to stop him from fulfilling the prophecy he had created for himself. The rush before the train actually came was amazing. It was almost as if the wind was blowing down onto him, encouraging him and telling him it was going to be okay. The grilled cheese had stayed with him ever since his mother had given it to him 2 days ago and 1 day and 3 hours before she died. She had been killed on the same railroad. He had tears rolling down his cheeks as he thought of his mother’s smile and enthusiastic outlook on his life. She was excited because of the acceptance letter from Harvard University had come in the mail 2 days ago. Without his mother’s incredible charismatic self to usher him on, he couldn’t bare to live and fulfill his dream of not long ago without her to accompany him. The train neared and neared but all of a sudden everything turned quiet. He saw his mother’s face and figure by the railroad but off the tracks and his reaction was to reflexively run towards the familiar figure and face. The train passed by while he was running off to what he thought was his mother. He knew that she had come to stop him from committing the sin in her name , she had come for one last time to save him and show him the right way. He turned around and looked at what was left of the grilled cheese on the tracks that his mother had lovingly made for him. Even her last gesture had been one of thoughtfulness and he wouldn’t ruin her name by doing what he knew she would condemn. He would go to Harvard and live his life Thoroughly.

She had been hiking for hours through the snow, on the search for her partner. The partner who had run off angrily after a heated debate had occurred between the both of them. She had told him that she wanted a break from their relationship and that she couldn’t handle one right now, but he didn’t want to hear it. He looked her right in the eye and, without hesitation, stated that he wanted to spend the rest of his life with her and he wouldn’t settle for less. Scared by the huge commitment promised in his eyes, she quickly said the only thing she knew that would save her from it, “ I don’t love you and I want you to leave me alone.” The harsh words were out of her mouth before she even realized it and she regretted them the second they had been uttered. She kept her eyes away after she had said it to keep her pride intact and not letting him see the apology and fierce tears in her eyes. He quietly said, “I’ll leave then.” After he left she didn’t have the courage to go after him until at least 30 minutes had passed. Now as she hiked she sensed something extremely wrong as she saw spots of red almost identical to blood on the snow. Fear spread through her and she quickened her pace. I can do this I can do this was what she repeatedly told herself as she hiked through the incredibly cold snow. There was a hill up ahead and she faintly saw the blood leading up it. At the top of the hill, she saw what she had dreaded all along, it was him, and he was lying there, breathless. She had no time to cry as she saw him with his head cushioned on the backpack he had carried with something shiny in his hand. The tears started to roll down as reality hit her: he had a diamond ring in his hand and a bullet in his chest with his wallet gone. Somebody had come and shot him for the money and he had probably taken out the ring after they had left and held it with a fierce grip.

Right when the doctor had said the words, he knew this was serious. He felt the unwelcome words grip his very soul. The only question that clouded his mind was, “how am I going to tell Lucie?” Lucie, his 17 year old daughter had just lost her mother 1 year ago and that had been incredibly hard on her. Now, he couldn’t even bear to think what this would do to her. He himself had been depending on his daughter for someone to lean on and so she had with him. But she was fortunately very strong and would be able to handle this, as always, with incredibly flexibility. Even so, reaching the house they had lived in since the day of his marriage with her mother, he couldn’t help but sit in the car and collect his thoughts and memories for a second. The rain that constantly pounded itself against the window, reminded him of the day his wife came to see the house for the first time after they had married earlier that day. He had bought it as a wedding present for her. She was laughing and asking him questions on the way over about why she needed to be blindfolded and he just looked at her beautiful face and graceful expressions and told her that it was a surprise and she shouldn’t ruin it. She was desperately trying to pry it out of him, but he wouldn’t budge. Clumsily she wrapped the bandana around her eyes while she awaited the surprise. When they arrived, it started to hammer rain. She laughed and said, “ I love the rain almost as much as I love you.” He knew the purpose for the remark and he gave her the kiss it had earned. He guided her out of the car and showed her the house. Her delight was one thing he would never forget. Now as he brought himself back to the present, he hoped he wouldn’t as he went inside to tell his daughter that he had phase 1 Alzheimer’s.

She left the airport feeling new and amazing. A new beginning had arisen for her. Her old life was just a memory long forgotten. The first thing she would do would be to go to the beach and see and feel the water and sand simultaneously. She would let her hair down and let it flow with the wind and let it feel as free as she felt. No more hounding over work and failed relationships. She would take this absence from work and relax. The one thing her doctor had been urging her to do for years. The medals were left behind on her desk as she boarded the plane to the destination of Palm Springs. She arrived at the beach, which had sand lain across it like amazing plush carpet, and under the golden sun, she let her hair down, and just stood in the barrier between water and sand because she was free, because she was free.

She departed from the train with child-like wonder etched all over her face. He watched her approach him steadily taking in all that surrounded her. She arrived at his “Information, Help, Lost & Found” desk and asked with a heavy accent, “Good afternoon, sir, I was wondering if you would tell me the way to Central Park.”
She was definitely a first time tourist to New York. “Yeah, actually I’m just about off of work I can show you if you’d like?” “That is outrageously nice of you.” “Not a problem, miss.” He guided her on the way to Central Park and if he could describe her in one word it would undoubtedly be free. She looked like she had not a care in the world. On the way, they discussed her country of birth, Czechoslovakia. She had come to attend her brother’s wedding who was marrying a “New Yorker” she stated, not American, but “New Yorker”. Once they had arrived she spontaneously ran into the fall leaves that had lain on the ground for a few days and the colors that jumped up around her light blue dress made her look absolute and perfect. Most would be searching for an absolution that never comes, but for her she found her own absolution everywhere by letting herself go and just having outrageous, spontaneous, wild, and crazy fun. He joined in with her and he, too, felt some of her carelessness and gleefulness rub off onto himself. New York is truly an amazing place during fall and he was eternally grateful that she let him see that.