My Favorite Mistake

         This is a no-longer-relevant vignette from a story I wrote ages ago. I'm rewriting the story and decided that while Nola does get a little wild and does something stupid, she wouldn't cheat on her fiancé/boyfriend, nor would she up and "sleep" with someone because she's confused. Ever.

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         With her car being out of commission, Nola was frantically looking for Donnie to give her a ride to work.
         “JC!” She called, running up to JC. “Have you seen Donnie?”
         “He didn’t tell you?”
         “Tell me what?”
         “They had an emergency at the feed lot, he left ten minutes ago.”
         “I need a ride, can you give me a lift?”
         “We’re heading out that way anyways.” Rico said before JC could answer. “We’ll give you a ride.”
         Nola thanked him as they climbed into the car.

         Halfway through her shift, Nola got a call.
         “It’s your lover.” Miles teased when he informed her.
         “I’ll take it in the back.”
         After closing the door, she picked up the phone.
         “Yeah?” She asked dryly. She knew it was Donnie and she was still upset with him.
         “Sweetheart, I’m sorry about today. I forgot your car isn’t working.”
         “You could’ve told me.”
         “I know, I’m sorry!”
         “Are you at least going to take me to dinner on my break?”
         There was momentary silence.
         “Well?”
         “I… won’t be home until late. A few of the cows got out and we still haven’t gotten them all.”
         “Why you though? Why couldn't they call Rico, or Stevie?”
         “Because they only needed half a dozen men and I was the sixth man that agreed to come in.We need the money, sweetheart. I’m trying to make a better life for us.”
         “That’s such a cop out!” She said angrily. “I don’t care about what we have as long we’re happy!”
         “I’m doing the best I can.” He responded, becoming angry as well.
         “You’re assuming you're doing what’s best for us without considering that I have a say in it.”
         “We’ll talk about it when I get home.” He huffed before hanging up the phone.
         Nola spent the next half-hour with a fake smile and shaking with anger. She was grateful when Johnny gave her the “All-Clear” for an hour dinner.
         She had her fill of the hot wings and deli sandwiches from the bar, so she decided to walk over to a nearby diner for a hamburger.
         It was pretty dead, and she sat at the end of the counter, hoping to avoid human contact aside from the server. Unfortunately, he was in the mood for human contact…specifically a female human.
         She ordered her meal and began to read a newspaper on the counter. He brought her milkshake, then stood there.
         “You’re the chick from that bar, aren’t you?”
         Sighing in annoyance, she nodded.
         “You seein’ anyone?”
         She held up her left hand to show her engagement ring. “Mmm-hmm. I see. So, what are you doing after work?”
         She rolled her eyes as she looked up from the paper. “Going home, to my fiancé.”
         “So how about tomorrow? Want to go out tomorrow?”
         “I don’t think my fiancé would like that.”
         “I wasn’t asking him.”
         “Look, I’m not going out with you.”
         “If this fiancé is so great, where is he? Why are you buying your own dinner on Friday night?”
         She was about ready to lose it on him when she felt a hand on her shoulder. “Sorry I’m late.” Ferris said, sitting on the stool next to her after a peck on the cheek.
         It took Nola only a split second to realize what he was doing. “Oh, hi honey. No big deal.”
         The server scoffed and went into the kitchen.
         “Thank you.” Nola breathed.
         “No problem. That guy’s a sleeze. He’s been here for years. I've seen him hit on every female who walks in that door.”
         “And here he made me feel so special.” Was her sarcastic response.
         Nola’s burger was brought shortly. “What do you want.” The guy demanded of Ferris. “Nothing you have.”
         With an evil look, the guy disappeared into the kitchen again.
         Nola cut her burger in half. “Want to share? I’m not going to finish this all.”
         He wordlessly accepted. They finished quickly and left.
         “I don’t have to be back for another half-hour. Let’s sit on that bench and talk for a bit.” Nola suggested.
         Nola did most of the talking, mostly about things she would like to accomplish, then became suddenly quiet.
         “What’s wrong?” Ferris asked.
         “I completely forgot about Donnie.”
         “What do you mean.”
         “I was so pissed off at him, but I feel totally…okay now.”
         Ferris didn’t know what to say. Their eyes met for a split second; his blue eyes caught the moon, making them look like perfectly clear sapphires, and Nola could not resist. She leaned in and kissed him softly. As their lips remained in contact, she laid her hand gently on his neck. His muscles were tense, but loosened up quickly. It was the most perfect kiss she ever had, and the longer it lasted, the less she wanted it to end. Her brain was telling her it was wrong, but every other part of her was telling her otherwise.
         Her heart was racing, and her skin was covered in goose bumps, despite the fact her face was burning.
         “I…I’m going to go back to work.” She said standing up quickly. Ferris said something, but Nola didn’t hear it.
         The rest of the night was a blur. All she could remember was Ferris. More specifically: the kiss. She could remember the feel of his lips, the smell of his cologne mixed with the clean smell of either soap or shampoo; maybe both. She thought his hand was moving around her waist to pull her closer, but she couldn’t be sure.
         “Hey kid! You got three beers up!” Johnny said impatiently, bringing her out of her stupor. She took the beers to the table and looked at the clock. It was two-thirty; time for last call. Miles’ voice announced this, the groans from the patrons showed their chagrin.
         Jay offered her a ride, and she reluctantly agreed. She followed him out, and was about to get in his Camero, when she heard a familiar engine behind her. Donnie pulled up right beside her in her Riviera, fixed and running like new, a tentative grin on his face.
         “Thanks anyways, Jay.” Nola hurried to the passenger side of the Buick. She got in and was given a half-dozen roses. She gave Donnie a kiss, and was suddenly overcome with guilt.
         “Nola, I’m really sorry.” He told her as they pulled out of the parking lot. “I’m really sorry, too.” She told him, scooting next to him so she could lay her head on his shoulder. “For what?”
         “Everything.” She felt like crying. She wanted to tell him what happened, but she wanted to keep it to her self, not because she didn’t want to hurt Donnie, but because it was a precious event to her. “It’s all right.” He put his arm around her shoulder and squeezed affectionately.
         You wouldn’t say that if you knew why I was apologizing. She quickly pushed the thought aside and replaced it with: As long as he doesn’t know, it’s okay.
         Then, she began thinking about the kiss again. It lingered on her lips even hours after they parted. Then the guilt came again. I love Donnie. She told her self, glancing up at him.
         He had barely parked the car in the garage when she grabbed him and kissed him passionately.
         “What was that for?” He asked with a satisfied grin. She only answered with a sly look.
         “I’ll race you to the bedroom.” She told him, rushing out of the car. Donnie struggled with his seatbelt, giving her a head start.
         They got to the room about the same time, slamming the door behind them.

         Donnie’s arm rested on Nola’s side and he held her close. “That was great.” He told her, nuzzling behind her ear. “Better than great,” She answered, turning over the face him. “Incredible.”
         He gently brushed her hair from her face. “I love you.”
         Suddenly, saying: “I love you, too” didn’t feel right. She kissed him then cuddled up to his chest. It was a ruse; she was disguising her uncertain expression.
         All she could think of was Ferris. At one point, she almost moaned his name during their lovemaking.
         Her doubts about her relationship grew with every passing day, eventually disrupting her work. It was time to do something.
         Her next day off was almost a week later; she started off by removing her engagement ring, and looked at her hand. “Okay.” She sighed. “This isn’t so bad.”
         The best way she could think to break it to Donnie was as quick as possible.
         He came home from the feed lot and headed straight for the shower. She sat on their bed for what seemed like an eternity.
         “Hi sweetheart.” He told her moving to kiss her, but she moved, turning to face him. She opened her mouth to speak, but the stunned look on his face stopped her. He had seen her bare finger. The speech she had planned escaped her. “I…” she put the ring in his hand. “I’m so sorry. I…I don’t feel like I thought I did.” She spoke quickly, and almost ran out of the room.
         She immediately went to the garage and took off.
         She just drove around, blasting a random radio station, not paying attention to what was on; she just needed to drown out the world.
         Eventually, she came to a stop in front of a familiar town-home, where Ace was sitting in a lawn chair drinking a beer.
         “Hey there! What are you doing here?”
         Nola looked at him and started laughing. “I have no idea! I was just driving and ended up here.”
         She walked over and grabbed another lawn chair to sit next to him.
         “Beer me, please!”

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

          The door to Ferris’ art studio was open just enough that Nola could see his back as he was hunched over his drafting table. “Ferris?”
         He grunted to acknowledge her presence, which she took as a cue to enter. She closed the door behind her and sat in a slipcovered armchair near the faux stained glass window, which sat in front of the desk.
         “Ferris, are you doing anything tonight?”
         He looked up at her. He was wearing a pair of wire frame glasses and had his collar-length hair held back. “I’m working on a special order. Why?”
         “Oh. Well, Miles is having a party, and I thought you would like to come.”
         He just shook his head and returned to the sketch in front of him.
         “I…guess I better go.”
         She hesitated before standing. Ferris looked up at her again, and the look he gave told her he wanted to say something. She slowly sat back down and looked at him expectantly.
         Ferris sighed before taking off his glasses and rubbing his eyes. “Nola--”
         “Yes?”
         He opened his mouth to speak, then closed his eyes, sighed, and looked at her again. “Am I…” He leaned back in his chair, then forward, resting his elbows on the table. He was obviously uncomfortable. “Did you break up with Donnie because of me?”
         “Is that what this was all about? Is that why you’ve been ignoring me? Because we kissed a week before Donnie and I broke up?”
         “Just…please, I need to know.”
         “Of course not!” Nola paused, then contorted her face into a slight grimace. “Maybe just a little.
         “But in a positive way!” She quickly added.
         “How is that positive!” He demanded, his voice breaking.
         “Ferris, it’s been over a month since we broke up. Donnie and I have talked about it and agreed it wasn’t meant to be.” She wanted so badly to kiss Ferris again. Ever since that one night, she wanted to relive the moment, to kiss him again, to smell him up close, to feel his body against hers.
         “How is that supposed to reassure me?”
         “I want to be with you.” She blurted out.
         He was taken aback. “Please leave.” He said quietly when he came around.
         “Ferris, please just give me a chance.”
         “I can’t!” He barked. It was her turn to be startled. “Look, I just can’t okay. Nola, I’m begging you to just let me be.”
         Her eyes burning with tears, she ran out of the room.
         No one saw her leave, and she ended up driving to Max’s house again. She was in the mood to do anything to get Ferris out of her head.
         Max didn’t have a chance to say anything before she threw herself at him, kissing him more desperately and passionately than she could remember. He pushed her away. “What-”
         “Is Ace home?”
         He shook his head.
         “Good.” She said with a mischievous grin.
         “What’s gotten into you?” He grinned as she pushed him inside and pulled his tee shirt out of his jeans. “When’s Ace coming home?” Was her reply as she forced him to the couch. “Uhm,” He let out a small laugh as she ran her hands down his stomach to undo his jeans. “I think he’s working late tonight.”
         “Excellent.” Nola pulled his pants off and straddled him. She buried her face in his neck and found a spot right behid his ear that caused him to shudder. The feel of his rough, warm hands excited her as they moved along her body, as if all the times he wanted to touch her but she wouldn't let him built up to this moment.
          They shifted positions with her on the bottom so he could get her boots and jeans off.
          He pulled his shirt off and lay down on top of her so he could resume kissing her. “Do you know how long I’ve waited for this?” He whispered while gently brushing her ear lobe with his lips, his long dark hair caressing her skin.
         She wrapped her legs around him and smiled “Far too long.”
          The next hour was passionate and intense. They ended up on the floor wrapped in a large ripple afghan facing each other, their spent, sweaty bodies still entwined.
         “What brought this on?” He asked, squeezing her briefly. “I don’t know.” She lied.
         “It was a nice surprise.”
         She giggled. “I bet.
         “Can I use your shower?”
         “Why not?”
         She got up and gathered her clothes. He was still lying down and watching her. “Mmmm…very nice.”
         Nola winked at him before vanishing into the bathroom.


         There were quite a few people at Miles’ party, so it was hard for her to find a familiar face. She was relieved when the first face she was Asia’s.
         “Can we go talk?” She shouted to be heard over the music. Asia nodded and followed her to a secluded corner of the back yard.
         “What’s up?” Asia asked. “I think I made a big mistake.” Nola said bluntly.
         “Why? What happened.”
         Nola told her about everything, starting with the night she kissed Ferris to the last thing he said to her before she left to Max’s.
         “I was so confused.” Nola began to tear up. “I thought if I did something drastic I could forget about it, but I think I made things worse.”
         “What did you do?”
         “Max and I...uhm…yeah.”
         “Oh.” Asia said simply. Nola groaned and slouched down, pulling up her legs. She folded her hands behind her head and dropped her forehead on her knees.
         Asia kneeled next to her and gave her a hug.
         “I just can’t believe I screwed up so bad.” Nola sobbed. It was hard for Asia to see her sister so upset, but she also knew there wasn't much she could do.
         After a few moments of heavy sobs, Nola quieted down.
         "It feels like I'm going to explode." She whispered as Asia stroked her hair.
         "Do you need to be left alone for a while?" Asia finally asked. Reluctantly, Nola nodded, leaning her head back against the chain-link fence.With a quick, but re-assuring hug, Asia walked back to the crowded house.
         Nola buried her face in her hands and began to cry again. She didn’t notice someone sat next to her until she could smell a familiar scent.
         “I thought you were busy tonight.” Her muffled voice sniffled.
         “Something more important came up.” Ferris said in all seriousness. Nola had to look at his face to see if it matched his tone.
         He thumbed a couple tears off her cheek, then kissed her deeply.
Reluctantly, she pushed him away. “Ferris, there’s something I need to tell you.”
         “All right.”
         It was hard for her to find the words. “Today, after I left,” She swallowed and focused her attention on her folded legs. “I went over to Max’s, and—I was so upset.” Ferris handed her a tissue he pulled out of a zip-lock bag in his pocket. It was oddly cute to Nola and she almost laughed. Instead, she wiped her nose and continued. “I wasn’t thinking clearly, and thought the best way to feel better was to do something extreme, so I had sex with Max.”
         Immediately, she began to regret it because Ferris’ expression appeared to read as disappointment. “You must think I’m a total whore.” Nola lamented, burying her face in her hands.
         “You made a mistake.” His voice was soothing, but there was a hint of uncertainty; though his hand rubbing her back enhanced the soothing tone of his voice. It still didn’t help her to feel less ashamed of herself.
         “But it’s one thing to make a mistake that effects my life, I had to drag one of my friends into it.”
         “Did he say ‘no’?”
         She thought for a moment. “Not really. But what normal man would say no to a woman who jumps on him and shoves her tongue down his throat.”
         “It’s not like you’re emotionally attached.”
         “The problem is that at one point we were.”
         “So what makes you think the attachment is still there?”
         “Why did I go to Max? Why not Jay? Why not a total stranger?”
         “Well, maybe because Jay still has it for you, and you have more class than to hit on a total stranger for a one night stand.”
         “How can you be so calm?” She asked, frustrated. She wanted him to be mad at her; she wanted him to punish her by getting so angry he’d never want to speak to her again. A part of her even wanted him to slap her.
         “Nola,” He took her hand. “This will blow over. It may be rough, but I will be here to help you through it.”