Beautiful...with dessert

Women all over the world have a fetish about their weight. I do too, but the thing that boggles my mind infinitely is (the reason) why we can’t just sit back and appreciate what mother nature decided to hand out in the “lucky packet” we call life?
“Surprise!” she must have shouted, very excited to let each of us see our dream bodies especially hand-picked for us.
Then that smile and excitement vanished as soon as she saw our gaping mouths gasping for any usable air around us - as long as it didn’t come from her demented world.
“How could we be so ungrateful?” I thought just the other day when a friend dropped by to show me her new pair of designer jeans, fresh from the mall, in a too-small-for-her-hips-size. All I heard during that frightfully long visit was how we (notice the ‘we’ part) were going to start a death-defying starvation diet and ‘spin’ till we couldn’t see straight. “I’m not doing that, sorry,” I said. Wow… wrong response to a friend under the influence of too much extra weight. She swayed to one side, almost as if I’d been holding her up and suddenly let go. It looked like a wave of nausea had swept through her entire body, turning her face a pale shade of red.
“How could you just leave me to do this on my own? I thought I could rely on you. You know how much I want to lose weight.”
So my sad and unthinking answer just spat itself out – “Well why don’t you eat a bit less and exercise a little more?” (Please note my careful use of certain modifying words to try to minimize the volcanic situation). Too late. Stuck in a big blob of lava-hot goo was I after she slammed the front door.

My advice to all women is something men have learnt a long, long time ago – never allow yourself to be pulled into a “weight chat” with a girlfriend or acquaintance. Just refuse because it will only make you feel overweight too. It honestly will if you constantly have someone around criticizing herself for being “fat”- at some stage you will analyse yourself too and over-analyse you will. When you get to that stage(oh, you will, even if you try to take my advice) think about this – who cares if you wear a size 38 and the models on Fashion TV are all size 28? Who do you think is more attractive to the world, the paper-thin-no-hips-only-bones or the healthy-looking-I-want-dessert kind of woman?
Don’t let go of what mother nature intended you to have. But also don’t destroy it – nurture and take care of your body. And know that you are uniquely beautiful, even with big hips and small boobs!
My friend returned apologetically after falling off the treadmill at the gym (I know- how do you fall off without doing something really stupid in front of EVERYONE?) She did something even more death-defying after the apologies and hugs were over. She took chocolate brownies out of her green bag for us to have with coffee…

Someone once said to me: “Surround yourself with positive influences for your mind, body and soul – just do this in moderation and ration your biscuits with each cup of tea.”
(This advice doesn’t help me – I drink at least six cups a day. That puts the biscuit count at twelve.)
Oh well, maybe I will be ‘spinning’ till I can’t see straight for the next couple of days after all!