The Road

I sat down and put on my Bob Dylan record looking for some inspiration for a song, and I had to hurry, because i was performing later that night. I never would have dreamed what would happen that day.

"I need a song about... love" I said out loud to myself. "I need a song about love and loss. Something real, something..." I faded out as I dragged my pen across the paper, writing what exactly was on my mind. Kelly.

After about 5 minutes of constant writing, my thoughts we spilled out onto the paper. They went from Kelly, to dating situations, to society's stereotypes, and finally stopped at my music.

"Hey, I'm going down to the beach, shout if you need me" I yelled to my grandmother as I walked out the door.

The beach is where I drew a lot of my inspiration for music and, thankfully, it was only a block down the road. My spot was never taken, because everyone in San Diego seemed too busy to sit down and listen to the waves, and look at the sailboats on the horizon. My spot was about 20 feet from the water under a palm tree thats starting to look about as old as San Diego itself.

This time of day, everyone is walking around the pier, oblivious to nature's beauty, trying to get where they're going.

"I only wish I could make them see..." I said to myself. "That's it!" My pen flew across the paper like a roadrunner as I wrote:


If only I could make you see what you're missing...
Nature and all its majesty...
You're too busy slaving, too busy to see...
You're missing what's really important, the view...

If only I could make you see,
through the haze society places in front of you and me...
If only I could show you what really matters,
everything would be better, it would all be clear...

Why can't we just--


I was cut short by the last person I expected to see today, Kelly.

"I was hoping to find you here" Kelly said with a smile.

My breathing was cut short and my heart skipped a beat. The last time I was with Kelly, we were putting flowers in soldiers' gun barrels at the last protest in Berkley. She was so beautiful with her long flowy skirt, tank top shirt, and a bandana holding her hair up but still messy. It was her eyes that captured my heart though, her eyes that still grab hold of my heart and shake it around a little bit.

"Want to take a walk?" I asked Kelly, trying my hardest to be as collected as possible.

"Yes I would" She replied with her beautiful smile. "Can I read your notebook again while we walk? I like the ones you write about love".

"Of course you can" I said, handing over the notebook. There was nothing I wanted more than to tell her how much I wanted her to be mine. Or to tell her that the songs I write about love are all about her.

"When did you write this one?" Kelly asked, pointing at what I wrote not even 5 minutes ago. "...and who's it about?"

"I wrote it just before the girl of my dreams came up to me and took me for a walk on the beach" I said.

Then I stopped myself and looked at the horizon instead of at her because I was so afraid she would hand back my notebook and walk away. Then, as if on cue, we both turned to look at eachother. A tear fell from her eye, and then I leaned in and touched my lips to hers.

Instantaneously, everything else around me stopped. The people walking, the boats, the water... The world.

"Kelly, i want you to be my girl. I want you to be the one I talk to until 3 in the morning, I want you to walk with me down the beach and stay even after the sunset" I said holding Kelly's hand to my chest. "Will you be mine?"

At first Kelly's face was blanc, showing absolutely no expression. She took her bandana out of her hair and placed it in my hand. Then she tore her hand away from mine and she ran away. I stood there with her bandana, wondering what the hell just happened.

I sat down right where I was as soon as she was out of my sight, and i stayed there until the sun went down. I kept that bandana close to my chest, and I just kept asking myself why it seemed like I was meant to be alone.

Everytime i got close to someone, everything we had fell apart so quick, but it was different with Kelly. Kelly was the one person who never judged me until she actually knew me, she didn't care about the killing and riots in the streets, or the killing in Vietnam.

She didn't get all excited and worked up about things that had nothing to do with her, like people get. Me and her were the only people in our neigborhood to welcome Danny and his family when they moved here. Everyone else gave them dirty looks and put hateful things on their lawn... Just because of their skin being a different shade than white.

That was the last thing I was thinking about before I fell asleep. I had a horrible dream that night, but I still can't remember what it was about.

"I knew I'd find you here" I heard an angel say out loud to me when I woke up.

I looked over and I saw Kelly sitting next to me with her knees up to her chest and her arms wrapped around them. It was the most relieving thing I could have ever seen, but I couldn't say anything, it just seemed physically impossible. I wanted to cry, i wanted to scream at her, I wanted to take her hand, I wanted to ask her 'what the hell happened', but all I did was sit up, scoot over to her a little closer, and put my arm around her.

Kelly looked up at me with eyes that were screaming, "I love you" and she leaned forward and touched her lips to mine.

"I love you Ryan" she whispered into my ear. We layed there for the rest of the night with the rising sun, the morning dog walkers and the sufers as our alarm clock.



I woke up the next morning to the bright sun rising over the shops and food stands on the pier behind us, and the surfers in the water in front of us.

"Good morning beautiful" I said to Kelly as I kissed her lightly. She slowly woke up and opened her eyes. She squeezed me tighter and just gazed into my eyes as I gazed into hers.


That day was a day that will always be in my heart, and so will Kelly. I lost Kelly 2 years later to cancer. She still sits with me on the sand, holds me, and sleeps with me in the sand. Kelly is, and will always be with me, and soon enough, well be together again.