Gift of a stranger

Gift of a stranger

Ashwini woke up late on that Sunday morning to see the sun already glimmering in the sky. Half-heartedly she got up from her bed and walked to the window. She had a fine view of the rear side of her colony from the bedroom window. Children were playing in the small ground which was actually intended for the general meetings held by the unconcerned members of the colony. Somehow the weekly meetings turned into monthly, quarterly and now yearly which Ashwini, regularly at the beginning but scarcely now attended. In the middle of the ground stood a large old Gulmohur tree, spreading its large hands to shadow the half of the ground. Old people in the colony sat during the long evenings, chatting, moreover complaining about their old age troubles to each other. Gulmohur was a meek witness, spreading its spoon shaped, orange-red ears to all their worries. In last four years, since Ashwini moved into this apartment, she had never observed more or less change in the tree or in the neighbourhood. She had rather no time to observe her surrounding. At the age of 29, her day started with a run to the bank, where she was working for last five years and now grabbed a senior position. Her day ended up cooking for herself in the kitchen. She had lost her all interests in music, television, dancing after her break up with her first and last love Mark. Four years back Mark returned to his parents in Canada. Soon he forgot his affair with Ashwini which lasted for two years and which Ashwini cared about and served it devotedly.

They met in a party of Darrel, a friend of Ashwini’s roommate from London and a famous Artist who visited India thrice yearly and gathered up people often to recuperate his contacts. Mark was an NRI came to India for some official work and had plans to stay back for a few months. After the first meet, there were more frequent visits Mark did with surprise gifts, flowers at her earlier residence at ‘Lady Margaret Ladies Hostel’ in the town. Rehma, a plump, bookworm student of Philosophy never liked Mark’s stopovers at their room. Before Mark came in her life, most of the weekends Ashwini visited her mother staying with her brother and his family in Poona. Now those visits turned into long drives with Mark, small picnics and shopping sessions followed by movies. The days were pink and nights were dark, filled with sensuous kisses and hugs. Ashwini gave him his whole and soul, so sure in her mind that this is the man she had been waiting for so long. She cherished their first kiss, first love making and soon she realised that it is getting harder to live without him, to wait for him the whole week to spend the entire day. Though Mark was equally involved, he also gave equal justice to his profession. Being a Manager at one of the finest Marketing firms at the age of 36, he made it sure that his career was not at a stake. He adjusted times according to her, keeping in mind his work. He had to stay back longer in India as his work required, they both melted into each other as the days passed. Soon Ashwini took a decision to buy a home for herself and in a way, a permanent rest for her and Mark. Mark indistinctly agreed to her decision, but only if she would take financial assists from him to buy her new Apartment.
‘I can manage on my own’, she tried to convince him, but he was reluctant and never agreed. Ultimately they found a suitable apartment in the Shahu colony. Ashwini liked the most of her apartment was the view from her seventh floor bedroom window which faced the back side of the colony. Behind the colony, there was an open space so she could reach her eyes up to the end of the city. In the evenings, she loved looking at the long roads. Heavy traffics used to look like a gathering of shining stars on the road. She could remember the same Gulmohur stood that time also, twinkling one of its flamed leaves. Mark stayed back many nights at her place rather driving back to his hotel. She loved the feeling of being with him, doing all the things possible to make him happy, to wake up in the morning beside him. Sometimes she remembered all of these and cried until she slept.

Time came after a year or so, when her mother and brother smelled a rat about Ashwini, not visiting Poona as often as she did earlier. Nevertheless she tried her love not to be disclosed to her family; ultimately she came out to them one day, when she went to Poona after two months.
Her mother disapproved to let her daughter married to a man, who was not from their own background. She refused Ashwini to meet him on the pretext that he was quite old for her age. She said, ‘You can have rows of boys standing out of your doorstep, who are of your age and also from our religion.’ Ashwini did not bother what her family said and returned soon. She decided on her journey back not to go back to her family who would never agree Mark to be a part of their family. She called up Mark as soon as she came back. Mark promised to stop over late that night. As soon as Mark entered her bedroom, she clanged him and cried for long sitting on the bed, telling him everything, still holding him tightly.

When she stopped weeping, she asked him in a firm tone, ‘Mark, when would we get married?’ Mark got disturbed for a while. He got up from her bed. Loosening his tie, he coughed and said, ‘Ash, do you really want to get married? I mean, we are fine like this. We have our own separate lives but still we are together, tied our hearts to each other’s. Can’t we have our lives like this?’ There was little gentleness than demand in the last question.
Ashwini realised what he wanted to say. He was a free man. She somehow noticed the reason of him not getting married though he was in his mid thirties. He tried to convince her the whole night, making love to her. The next morning, when Mark left, she called up in the bank and told her colleague that she was not keeping well. She decided to stay home and think about the situation. She sat in the bed till noon, turning pages of the ‘Society’, without reading a single line. She wanted to talk and consult but she never made many friends in her life because of her shy and serene nature. Although she had two friends from the hostel with whom she talked more than her colleagues in the bank about how bad their rooms are and for how many hours did the water come that day, there was no personal bonding and sharing her personal life was too far for her to think of.. In the afternoon when Mark called her up, she sounded frailer than the day before. He was concerned about her and when she assured him she was fine, he told her to meet him the same evening at a near by restaurant for dinner. They sat in the last corner, where the dim light was dimmer, a perfect place, according to Mark to be with your beloved. They spent there two hours with delicious prawns curry with grated cheese and added Kashmir kebabs.. her favourites. He ordered French wine ‘Bordeaux Chateau Meriguet’ instead of his favourite ‘Chenin Blanc’.
She asked him why he not ordered the regular one. He overlooked her question by saying, ‘Just like that, I don’t like it anymore’.
It somehow bothered her. She always wondered how he could alter whatever he wanted at any spur of a moment. It was easy for him to change his likings, his favourites if he wanted, but it was not for her. He held her hand in his and slipped a golden ring in her middle finger when she was in her thoughts. She gasped looking at the ring. Mark still holding her hand said to her, ‘You wanted to marry me. But for me, this moment is not less than a wedding. This is my proof that I love you and will never leave you.’….

She surprised to remember each and every word of their conversation in their last meeting at the restaurant while standing at the window. Her past flashed for a moment in front of her eyes. In the next two weeks, he was busy with his work and they had only talked twice, promising to meet on coming weekend. But by the weekend came, he called up to say ‘Good bye’ that he had to fly soon to Canada for official purpose. He promised to write her or call whatever was possible. For a week after he left, Ashwini didn’t hear anything from him. She waited for days and nights but he didn’t call. She charged her mobile again and again, kept it near the windows for a clearer network. On one Saturday afternoon her mobile rang and she rushed to pick it up. She was quite sure it was Mark and as she heard his voice, she broke into tears.

He said everything from ‘sorry’ to ‘I am really bad that I made you cry’ to calm her down. When she finally stopped crying, he told her that he was too busy and could not make it up to give her a single call. He was not sure when he would come back to India; in fact he was unsure about his next call. She asked him his contact number, but he refused, saying it would be expensive to call him up to Canada. She somehow got swayed that he will call her in the next week. But ultimately when he didn’t call next week, her hopes faded. She convinced herself that he was really busy to call her up. His calls extended from weeks to months. She started realising their stained relationship in back of her mind but she didn’t want to accept the truth. Eventually when Mark called her after 3 weeks past his last call, he told her that it was too hard for him to carry out this distant relationship and he needed to conclude it. Ashwini on the other hand almost fainted, pleaded him not to do this to her. But he was firm as usual but he promised to keep in touch with her. It took several months for her to come out of the trauma, she least expected any support from her colleagues and her friends who barely know her personal life and she didn’t want to go back to her parents who had already detached all strings with her.

Since then she was dragging her life only with one hope that Mark would turn to her again, he would come and take her away. Although at the Mark’s end there were drastic changes in his life. He quickly came out of Ashwini who now had become his only a distant friend, whom he regularly, once in a half year called. He had settled his life and left the old office, same year when he came to Canada. Now he was into deep love with a Chinese girl named Capreena, who was in her early thirties. Over the phone and sometimes through mails Ashwini had all the details of his life. Though she was least bothered about his personal life, maintained her love for him through out the four years. She wasn’t surprise to discover his new love for Capreena as for him everything could have changed if he wanted…like his favourite wine, he had changed his woman. As he promised, Mark never left her. Through phones, mails and her dreams, her love for him kept alive, hovering through out her life. She couldn’t take him out of her mind and bothered little about herself. She started looking old. Her almond eyes lost their shine and they were gloomy over the period. One can easily trace black circles around her eyes. Though she maintained her posture, she looked as she was lost in her own World.

Ashwini, looking at the kids playing down in the ground, realised that what Mark said was not true, except his last sentence. ‘I will never leave you’. He had never left her. She never lived a single day without remembering him. He was there always on her mind, making her sick and giving her a reason to unburden her filled eyes. She was more nervous today as she remembered her conversation with Mark the other day. He was in India with his would be wife Capreena and wanted to meet her. They decided to meet on Sunday afternoon for lunch with couple of friends. She sat on her bed for a while. Then she got up to get fresh and make her a cup of coffee. While sipping her coffee from the big, square mug, she gave a thought to herself, why can’t I meet him and his Capreena? I would see him after so long, after so many years, how would he react to it? How would I react? ... There were a series of questions boiling up in her heart with every sip of coffee. By the time she reached the bottom of the mug, she made up her mind to see her love. She opened up her cupboard and picked up a pale yellow Sari with mild brown floral design on it. She looked into the mirror, draping herself. Wearing make-up was not her style but she puffed some powder and then sat down, looking at her reflection. How far she had come in the grief of Mark that she had forgotten how she looked in last four years. Her face suddenly looked unknown to her. She cried sitting on the floor, wondering how shattered she was and now she had to face Capreena too. The thought made her pale. The thought of Capreena made her feel much older…much paler and she decided not to see Mark and Capreena that day. She called up one of their common friends to tell Mark about her absence.

Mark was not very much excited to meet Ashwini but Capreena was. She had heard a lot from Mark about Ashwini’s beauty (as he always mentioned it as an Indian Beauty) and her smile and many other things… It bothered her not to see Ashwini at the dinner table. Next day she took her number from Mark and called her up personally. Mark’s number on her mobile made Ashwini’s heart go shudder. When she heard a woman’s voice, she got more tensed …she was sure that the lady on the other side of the line was Capreena. She switched of her mobile without replying. Days passed in anxiety and stress more than the four years for Ashwini. She didn’t want to meet Capreena but she was not sure the reason behind it was jealousy or fear to meet the woman who stole her Love. As much as she thought about it she realised that it was fear to meet Capreena that came in between her and her ex-lover. She wanted to meet Mark. She wanted to confirm if he was also growing old like her.. was he also greying in his late thirties like her in her late twenties… was there a bit change in his charming personality… she wanted to confirm, had there been a bit change in him… without her in his life…
But she was scared equally to know that the women beside him would be his wife…she would stay with him life long, share his bed, share his dreams and his love… once which was Ashwini’s.
Mark didn’t stop calling her as a friend and never stopped inviting her. He always insisted that Capreena wanted to see her. But with one or the other excuses she refused to meet them.

A few days passed in the same trauma when Ashwini met Darrel accidentally in the ‘Infinity Mall’ when she was shopping for the week. Darrel asked about her and told her about his next party on coming Sunday at his newly bought apartment at Green hills. He insisted her to come for the party… at least to meet up with the old friends. Ashwini grittily agreed to join the dinner at Darrel’s new apartment. She knew that Mark would be there and Capreena too…
But this time she wanted to have a single glance of her Love… she wanted to see him…desperately. Urge to meet Mark overcame her fear to meet Capreena… consequently she decided to face her fear for a glance of her love.

On the Sunday evening she dressed in a white self embroidered Sari with a sleeveless blouse. The drapery of the white silk made her confident when she saw her reflection in the mirror. She reached at Darrel’s at the given address at 8 in the evening. Her heart was beating faster and her body was thrilling. She could feel her back was wet with sweat due to nervousness.
When she entered Darrel’s bungalow, she was heartily greeted by Darrel and her distant friends. Her eyes started searching for Mark and she herself tried to hide from Capreena’s eyes. The moment passed when she saw Mark and Capreena, walking beside him, approaching her. She realised that she was more nervous now and her forehead had grown drops of sweat. She dabbed her face with her hanky and adjusted her Sari ...just to calm herself.

As Mark came to her, he hugged her in a western style gave her a kiss on her chick and introduced her to Capreena, ‘Meet Capreena, she was eager to meet you’. Turning to Capreena, he said, ‘Isn’t she beautiful Capreena?’

Capreena was staring at her from top to bottom when she was still adjusting her pallu
When their eyes met… Capreena said to Ashwini in her Chinese English accent, ‘You look really gorgeous. What made him to leave you?’

Suddenly all the fears flew away from Ashwini’s mind when she heard Capreena’s words. Her anxiety deepened and ultimately vanished in her thoughts. She didn’t realise when Mark was gone to entertain his other friends and what Capreena was asking to her… she was still in the Capreena’s words.
When Capreena touched her hand to see Ashwini’s filled eyes. She just said ‘Thanks’ to Capreena. She looked at Mark talking to other guests through her wet eyes and….. she saw him tiny and insignificant…. His pleasant personality blurred through her eyes when a drop of tear rolled down her chick. There was no fear left in her mind for the woman standing beside her and there was no Love left for the man in front of her….


The next morning Ashwini woke up early to see the Sun about to set. She went to the window, looked down. The old Gulmohur was still standing but today there were new colours added to its branches or probably there were new colours in the sky for her…..