Rescued by a Heroine

-Just the other day i made a new friend,..i was just aimlessly walking through manhattan not paying much mind to any of my surroundings,...hoping to get hit by a car or something..then i noticed someone in an alley at first glance i saw them motioning to me to walk over to them,..so i did,...words were spoken and i was introduced to her.


-She seemed sweet and innocent enough,...but i should've known better,...i should always know better isn't that how it always goes....we hung out in an old dark abandoned building,...lit only by candle light,..and full of squatters,...mostly teens and old dirty bums,....the place smelled of lost souls and hopless fears the kind that paralyze you. for almost two hours i just sat there and stared at her not really having much to say,...then she spoke to me i heard her voice inside me,...in my head...her voice sounded empty and numb...she asked about my problems,...she knew i had...how she knew i will never know, but she did,....she swore to me she could make the hurt, anguish, and the self-hating agony go away,...and i begged her to show me how...and that's when everything changed for the better and for the worst.


-She was opened, cooked, and fed into a needle filtered through cotton,....things started to feel beyond real,...at this point my life became surreal, as if it wasn't already.


-I started to think how much i didn't like needles,...but she was persistant,...she made promises that i've been longing for...she told me that in one swift instant she could make it all go away...and i fell for it i landed right into her trap,...but in retrospect i was there of my own will...what has become of me,...where has my innocence gone off to?


-Fist clenched, nerves goin crazy, veins throbbing....and she gets closer, she breaks skin,....as i watch this happen i can't help think it's all a dream that i will soon awaken from,...but deep in my heart in know this is all to real...small blood cells leave my body and enter the needle...mixing in with my new friend...injecting numbness into me,..it invades my veins,...i can feel it's warmth overwhelm me...pulsing through me, smoothly...i start feeling light headed,...and to be honest i don't regret this...she flows all around me, in me, through me...i allow her to comsume me...to undo me.


-She showed me a world with no pain and in that same right , no love....a beautiful world with nothing but numbness...indifference...and nothing can hurt me now,....i am free for once in my miserable existence i am truly free....and that's when it hits me,...that's when the tears begin leaving my eyes,...i realize that this feeling won't last forever, and that thought alone could kill me...she showed me a heaven without God, and she knew i would love it there,..she knew i would want to go back time and time again...she has become my one true friend,...she understands me...she has confided in me and knows when i need to be consoled...

...she is my heroin.