Curse of College

Is it coincidence
that I was thrice blessed
with names of great divinity or
is it just a joke by the light
that guides us
or maybe the darkness born of
great sin?
Is there a purpose for me?
the adventures and misadventures
born from my duality
sense of adventure,
there’s someone
or something watching me.

Should I keep going
or should I give up all that I am
to please the undoubting human side
of me.
However,
I am human aren’t I?
I bleed,
I cry,
I feel pain yet
I feel them so deep sometimes,
it’s like Gaia
crying out for us,
for the trees, the foliage,
the plants, the animal,
creatures big and small.
There is some
hopelessness in this feeling
but should I feel this much
for things,
which are out of my control?
In the words of my human side
“Who the hell am I? What am I?”

I see the vices
of those around me,
silently, I cry out
to tell them to stop.
Stop polluting your bodies.
Stop sacrificing your souls
to feed the inane cravings
of your bodies.
Think of life, your life,
think of your future,
think of your love ones,
and think where all these games
of gambling with your heart,
mind, body and soul will take you.

What?
Do you think that vodka, shots,
hard liquor,
will be your friend,
or bring you friends, or make life better,
or bring you
undeserving happiness?
Will it, write your term paper
or is it just the “thing”
to do?
Does the idea of bringing
your own destruction
thrill you?
Then go ahead and don't worry,
for deep down I too
will soon follow.

I will soon follow for I am weak
and reak with self destruction
I follow
and follow
when all gets dark
all common sense and morals
fleet away
when the sun goes down
my soul is gone
and the demons dance
until the day light reigns again.