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by funink Author IconMail Icon
Rated: GC · Novel · Comedy · #1020999
What if Climate Change is part of an Alien plot to alter Earth's atmosphere.
REPTILIAN EMPIRE A Novel

Introduction

What if Climate Change is not an accident but part of a diabolical plan to alter Earth's atmosphere for Alien colonization? What if the purpose of human life on Earth is to create lots of CO2, for oxygen sensitive Reptilian Invaders? Could humans be just a chemical agent introduced to the planet-like alcohol-producing bacteria in wine? What if there are Humans among us working on behalf of their Reptilian masters-some traitors even among our most trusted leaders?



Well, if you can accept that premise, nothing in my hilarious political satire, Reptilian Empire, will be beyond imagination.



Leaders of the G7 nations are meeting in Toronto. Cross-dressing Secret Agent Bernie (Bernice) Slackbacker is there to blow them up. His controllers believe the carnage will draw the rest of the world into the War for Oil in Iraq. That suits the Reptilian's purpose. More war, more destruction, more oil to burn. How can they loose?



Throw into the story, Olgon, a good guy, pot smoking, Human Alien come to help humanity, Dirk Davies a tourist from Los Angeles who can't decide whether he's living a life or writing a sci-fi novel, and the lovely and talented Kitty Lunt, Dirk's love interest, who's come to Toronto to find her missing brother Eldridge and is kidnapped by Bernie Slackbacker and his gang. The bad guys think she will lead them to Eldridge and Olgon the Human Alien. Dirk is drawn into the plot as he tries to rescue Kitty.



Add to this a couple of Iranian Taxidermy Students Abdulla and Nassir, from Akron, Ohio, who are chosen to be the fall guys when the shit hits the fan, Osama bin Laden causing mischief, President Jerry Shrub who sleeps with his teddy bear, First Lady Laura Lee who sleeps with Vice President Rick Dick, Zab a Human Alien in orbit around Earth, narrating the story, and a group of loveable homeless men who could turn the tide in the final conflict. Throw in some graphic sex, full nudity, naughty language, irreverent social satire and cynical ruminations. Cook slowly over a smoke free fire and you've got a saucy little story of love, betrayal, intrigue and possible Armageddon.



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