Another Housing Plan

Though my mother and I live in separate houses, she's always thinking how we can be closer to each other. I'm an only child, and she's outlived two husbands. We depend on each other for a lot, but we're both independent of nature.

We're only seven miles apart, but when we need each other it seems like we live in different towns, considering I live in Mesquite, and she lives in the heart of Dallas. The metroplex is a huge area of different suburbs and different life styles, stretching for miles in every direction. We would spend more time doing things together if we lived closer than seven miles from each other. Her idea would put us together as almost back door neighbors. That sounds close enough to suit both our needs.

"I talked to a man who has a house for rent, almost behind my house. It's a three bedroom, and I like it. He's considering cutting the rent if he rented to a single person. He said no pets at first, but he said I could bring "Chablis." We are both attached to our pets. She has an old Chow, and I have two cats and two big dogs. That meant this idea didn't involve me moving into the rent house. She'd already considered my moving, but not to the rent house.

Now was my time for a long pause, not really knowing what to say. She'd been wanting to make some changes in our living arrangements for some time.

"We can't live together," Mother said. "I've tried to find a house in the neighborhood for us, or you to live in, but it's been years and I don't think we could afford to put you in another house around here. This neighborhood is getting more expensive every day."

"I know that's true," I said. What she was saying was still sinking in. Mother wants to move out of her big house. She's got so much space, and she hasn't had a housekeeper for several weeks. She can't keep the yard anymore. She seemed ready to leave her house for a smaller place.

What struck me was that she was the one to be doing the moving. I never thought she'd move. She always seemed to love her house, though I didn't particularly. The place has strange woodwork in the den, a very golden blonde shade. It's just not a house I would have chosen for myself, and I'd never lived in that house, only visited. It's okay, but it's not me, if you know what I mean. But, I'm open to changes. Her house is much bigger in square footage than mine.

As the conversation progressed, I saw that she planned for me to move into her house, be her back door neighbor, and sell the house I'd lived in the past seven years. And it begins to sink in that chaos is about to take control.

"I'll have a sale, and get rid of the things that aren't important to me anymore," she responded when I said she's have a bed for every bedroom. I knew already one bedroom would be dedicated to her having a study. She uses the breakfast nook in her house presently.

She ended the conversation with the dropping of the bombshell. We shall uproot, and move on. She's stated some wishes as to her care as an 83 year-old. She doesn't want to be put in a nursing facility. Mother nade it plain that she wanted to stay under her own roof as long as possible.

On the other hand, my heart isn't palpitating about this, as her deciding to move, or me move has been coming in cycles for years. We've done this almost four times in the past few years. Somehow, it ends up falling through. Onlu part of me believes this could actually come to pass.

Downsizing does make sense. Her house is a lot to clean. So many rooms, and one can only occupy one room at a time, On the other hand, my stuff is causing mt to bulge at the seems at my present location. The neighborhodd has become rougher where I live. Only a few nightsd ago, a driver stopped his car, and got out harassing a pedistrian. I called 911, and heard part of the police report. Young punk in the neighborhood is stealing from open garages, and the man called him on it. The punk threw something that looked like a circular saw blade. There was assault intended, right in front of my house. There are more kids roaming the street at night too. I'm glad I have two big dogs.

Moving is such a hassle. Pick up everything you won, put it in a box, and move it to another location. It's a good for spring house cleaning. At least this isn't happening in the heat of summer. If the weather would cooperate, this could be a pleasant endeavor.

In the meantime, I'll pack upo my overnight bag, and sprend the night at Mom's house, so I'll wake up early to see the house with her and the rental man. This could be a new phase in my life, or another bum steer along the way. In either case, I have a good outlook on the outcome. Changes are difficult, but sometimes you need a kick in the arse to nmove ahead, and I've felt stagnant.