This week: A Royal Drama Edited by: Kitti the Red-Nosed Feline More Newsletters By This Editor
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Is there a family without any drama? What novel/movie/TV series would be much, much shorter if only the main characters were better communicators?
This week's Drama Newsletter is all about conflict, and conflict resolution.
Kitti the Red-Nosed Feline |
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Wherever I go online these days, they’re there: Harry and Meghan, and the British Royal Family, all over the headlines, and TV channels, and even my normally trusty streaming service. I have no interest in this drama, but there they are, with some bizarre stories that I was absolutely fine living without. I know, without ever having wanted to, that there’s a new book out. There have been interviews, there’s a documentary, and otherwise sensible people have taken a side in this whole thing, much like years ago they’d be Team Jacob and Team Edward. Except, this is real. Allegedly.
I realise that by writing this newsletter I am adding to the chaos. My apologies. The sheer amount of input I’ve been exposed to is in need of an out, and I’m afraid that this is it. I won’t air these people’s dirty laundry, nor speculate about who’s right and who’s wrong. I’m just going to use them as an example to say that families are complicated. I’m certain that when you get right down to it, most of us have relatives we don’t quite get on with, and memories of events that could have gone a whole lot better, if only…
My own family is a good example. I grew up thinking that I only had a tiny number of relatives, but it turns out that one side of the family had a past with the other side of the family, and then there were those who were simply born and raised in various parts of the country, never having thought of (or desired) to connect. It wasn’t until I was an adult that I had a peek at my family history, and I have yet to figure it out. I know that my maternal grandfather’s ancestors fled France due to religious persecution (they were Huguenots), and set up a church. This led to a line of religious leaders, which ended with my grandfather, who went and set up his own church due to religious differences. I know that during World War II my great-grandfather and his family ended up in a camp, and the resulting trauma the survivors lived with caused long-lasting tension. I know that there are family secrets that I might never uncover. In some cases, those who knew the truth have passed away. There are stories hinted at, and whispered of, and I wish that people’d be more open and honest with the other. I guess I’ll never know the reasons, nor those parts of our history that must, apparently, be hidden from prying eyes. I understand the urge to maintain face, but it sometimes makes me sad, too.
There has to be a better way, somewhere between throwing everything out into the world and having it dissected by the media, and keeping family history under lock and key, forever. It is always said that communication is key, so why is it often so difficult?
We all know the kind of movie that could be hours shorter if only the main characters had paused for a moment and communicated some crucial point. Many a famous misunderstanding could have been avoided, if only one party had explained, and the other actually listened. We’re quick to (mis)judge, grow defensive, tempers flare, and before you know it something’s horribly wrong. Trouble is, it tends to take far more time and effort to fix a wrong than to cause it. And the memories of the event last a lifetime.
When writing a story, then, it’s important to think of conflict resolution as well as the drama of the situation, and the inevitable fall-out. How are your characters going to make things right? How will they overcome the hurt between them? Is it even possible? Any resolution must be true to the nature of your characters. How you would fix something is not necessarily what they would do under the circumstances. It also should be reasonably realistic. A great hurt is unlikely to be forgiven with a shrug of the shoulder. That said, some people can hold a remarkably powerful grudge over the tiniest slight.
I hope that the royals will fix things, and soon. It’s difficult for anyone to cope with all that anger and pain. Plus, on my end, I look forward to no longer seeing those names in the headlines day, after day, after day.
If, however, you’re into following the events... well, apparently there’s a book out. Enjoy!
Kitti the Red-Nosed Feline
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