This week: Healthy Relationships in Drama Edited by: Kitti the Red-Nosed Feline More Newsletters By This Editor
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Which characters do you feel have the best relationship? Many fictional relationships are rather dramatic. They needn't be.
This week's Drama Newsletter is all about healthy relationships.
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Relationship drama. It’s pretty much a standard in romance novels, isn’t it? In fact, it’s present in any and all genres that contain a romantic element. Two people get closer and closer. They fall in love. They finally get together but oh, something goes wrong! One or both might have a secret, or an outsider interferes, or the circumstances they find themselves in tear them apart! Will they get back together? Most of the time they do. There’s got to be that tension, though. That drama. But why?
I sometimes feel that writers struggle with the concept of healthy relationships. Or, maybe many people do. I’ve been on the receiving end of regular expressions of concern about my relationship, because my husband and I never fight. They fear that our marriage must be boring, flat, doomed to fail. It baffles me. Isn’t it a good thing that everything’s going smoothly? That if there is a minor issue we simply talk it through without animosity? That our approach is us against the problem rather than us against the other? I don’t feel bored. There’s a lot of fun, a lot of laughter. We have no intention of breaking up!
Healthy relationships exist. Not every couple lives a life like a soap opera. Thank goodness. There are people who have spent most of their years on this planet together, still as fond of the other (or more!) than when they first fell in love. Sure, they will have put in the work to make their bond last, but that does not mean that there has been a bucket load of drama. Nor does that mean that their love is not interesting. It’s good to hear success stories.
Yet, drama is what tends to be offered. Worse, some popular fictional relationships are plain toxic. That is problematic, especially when they’re aimed at teenage girls and young women. Stories like Twilight, After and 50 Shades offer a dangerous distortion of what to look for in a romantic partner. They romanticise pretty much everything one should avoid!
That’s not to say that the realm of fiction is completely devoid of healthy couples. Even when drama surrounds them (because, of course), some couples offer at least some insight into good relationship dynamics. A few of them are found in unexpected places. Think, for example, about Morticia and Gomez in The Addams Family. They absolutely adore the other, they love their children, they are loyal and supportive. Shrek and Fiona come to love the other and accept the other for who they are. Arthur and Molly Weasley from the Harry Potter novels and movies struggle financially, but they do their very best to offer their children a loving, stable environment. They have good morals and big hearts – big enough to open up their home to Harry and Hermione.
It would be nice to see and read more stories of loving, faithful, supportive couples who respect the other and know how to communicate with the other. If there must be drama (and hey, this is the Drama newsletter), let them face it together. Let it not tear them apart. Let them form a unified front, as couples so often must in reality. Let’s show that healthy relationships need not be boring. That love needn’t be toxic in order to fascinate. That when you grow together and work things out together you can succeed.
Wishing you inspiration,
Kitti the Red-Nosed Feline
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