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Printed from https://writing.com/main/newsletters/action/archives/id/10158-Orange-You-Glad.html
Comedy: May 06, 2020 Issue [#10158]




 This week: Orange You Glad
  Edited by: Annette Author IconMail Icon
                             More Newsletters By This Editor  Open in new Window.

Table of Contents

1. About this Newsletter
2. A Word from our Sponsor
3. Letter from the Editor
4. Editor's Picks
5. A Word from Writing.Com
6. Ask & Answer
7. Removal instructions

About This Newsletter

Dear fun writers and readers, I am Annette Author Icon and I will be your guest editor for this issue.


Word from our sponsor

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Letter from the editor

Orange You Glad I Didn't Say Banana?


Ha. Ha. Ha. That's not that funny. It's the answer to the most pedestrian knock knock joke from the far reaches of elementary school. But jokes involving bananas are everywhere, so you should not dismiss them just because they are childish.

Do you remember that time when cell phones were in everyone's pocket, yet there were still those who thought they had to hold a cell phone by spreading their elbow as far as it could possibly go from their body at an unnatural angle when they were holding such a device up to their ear?
Do you remember when those conversations were so loud that everyone in the room, in the room over, and possibly in the next zip code could hear the whole one-sided conversation?
Do you rememeber when cell phone etiquette had to be taught so that those elbow spreading and loud speaking persons stopped spreading and yakking at least long enough to conduct business with a third person?

I remember.

I remember working in a coffee shop near a university campus. To their credit, the vast VAST majority of university students never showed me theirs or asked me to show them mine.

But that one guy.

You've seen him.

He came into the coffee shop making sure we all saw his cell phone. At the least he made sure we all saw his elbow sticking out from his form and heard all the parts of his converstation.

He stood in line and kept spreading and talking.

It was his turn to order and he kept spreading and talking.

My co-worker picked up a banana that was for sale and held it up to his ear. Of course, he made sure to spread that elbow as far as it would go. He then proceeded to have a loud and engaged conversation with that banana.

I forgot what the banana said, but I remember that guy's face who thought that spreading and talking and not ordering was the kewl thing to do.

Ha!

Now he had to wait until the banana was finished talking.

*Banana*

Moral of the story: Don't let a banana upstage you. And if you do, be glad I didn't say banana. I only talked to it.


Editor's Picks

 Invalid Item Open in new Window.
This item number is not valid.
#402000 by Not Available.

 The Gorilla and the Banana Open in new Window. (E)
The power of Pro-suming! Stop being the mashed, eaten Banana!
#879493 by Beth Barnett Author IconMail Icon

 
Image Protector
STATIC
Well, I’ll Be a Monkey’s Mother Open in new Window. (ASR)
A haibun for writer's cramp about a monkey & bananas....not what you might expect!
#692154 by winklett Author IconMail Icon

A Banana in my Brain Open in new Window. (ASR)
What it's like with Asperger's Syndrome
#879105 by Pony Tale Author IconMail Icon

 That Tutti-Frutti Hat Open in new Window. (ASR)
Carmen Miranda's Hat---for the Third Son of Slam
#729774 by Joy Author IconMail Icon

 Banana Split Open in new Window. (E)
My favorite ice cream dish.
#1016036 by Prosperous Snow celebrating Author IconMail Icon

 Goodbye, Cavendish Open in new Window. (E)
Everything you ever wanted to know about baby bananas, and then some...
#1003937 by BeHereBook Author IconMail Icon

 
Image Protector
STATIC
Banana Nut Open in new Window. (13+)
Politics is a cheap game
#1921281 by edgework Author IconMail Icon

 Escape to Monkey Island Open in new Window. (E)
A lab monkey learns of a 'monkey only' island ... and journeys there.
#1499654 by TheNoMonster Author IconMail Icon

 Invalid Item Open in new Window.
This item number is not valid.
#1654848 by Not Available.

 
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Ask & Answer

I got this reply to my last Comedy newsletter "Born Funny" Open in new Window.

Quick-Quill Author Icon wrote: I feel timing is everything. You can read a joke and it wont be as funny as when it's told with proper timing. There is a guy on AGT who was born with deformed arms. His first appearance on the show was a terrible audition. His jokes were funny, but he was so scared his timing, didn't get many laughs. I was surprised to see him passed on to the next phase. He got help I'm sure and made it into the top 3 at the finals. He's on Champions now and He's got the timing down to a T. Timing/delivery is key. When writing comedy you have to allow for timing in your set-up.

I agree. I wonder though how you set up timing for a written delivery as we are dependent on the reader to time their reading to the tempo of our joke.

What Kind of Fruit Are You?


Let's be Fruity! Open in new Window. (E)
What kind of fruit are you?
#1156941 by spidey Author IconMail Icon


for Let's be Fruity! quiz

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