Hello, Prosperous Snow celebrating aka nfdarbe!

INITIAL IMPRESSION / OVERVIEW:

I enjoyed reading your "Nightingale Wake Up Call" poem.

Your writing kept me riveted and I read straight through to the end.



MORE DETAILED FEEDBACK:

Happy Writing.Com Anniversary month! I hope you enjoy this review as a celebration of your time here and find the review uplifting and encouraging.

Pantoum is a form I really like and I enjoyed reading your "Nightingale Wake Up Call" version. I haven't personally used humor with a Pantoum form poem so it was a neat surprise to find that you did, and did it well. It made me smile at the end.

Your "Nightingale Wake Up Call" poem made me remember the Asian / Oriental (I forget?) poetry contest that was active at the time you wrote this. I wondered if that was the "invalid item" at the end? It's sad when great contests peter out. I enjoyed that one.

My favorite line was the last one because it made me smile and was a surprise.

I hope, whatever the contest was, that you placed well in it.

I thought the Nature, Home/Garden, and Inspirational genres you selected were appropriate for this poem of yours.


IDEAS TO MAKE YOUR PIECE STRONGER:
In the spirit of helpfulness, I have one little suggestion to make your piece stronger. If you're interested in some constructive criticism, read on. But if you aren't, no worries. Just know that I enjoyed your piece and move on to the next section.

Still reading? You're brave! Yay for you!

In this line: "The sparrows join the nightingales choir," I think that nightingales should be possessive. It's the choir of the nightingales, yes? So, maybe check the grammar rule on that. I think, but am not sure, that it would properly be "nightingales' choir." In the first line, it could go either way (and seemed more right to me the way you have it already), but in this one it definitely seemed to require a denotation of possession.

As with any review, please take what serves you and release or ignore what doesn't.


CONCLUSION:
I enjoyed reading your "Nightingale Wake Up Call" poem and revisiting the Pantoum form.

Thank you for sharing your time, creativity, heart, experiences, and writing with the Writing.Com community!

Once again, happy anniversary month! I hope the year ahead is filled with blessings and joy for you!

May love, joy and peace be yours in abundance!
PWheeler










Positive Hearts
A Review from: "Positive Hearts Reviews Group" 



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My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .