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 Review #4771784 |
 | Watch His Feet  [E] Are his lips moving? Is he dancing? A lawyer learns something about truth in court.  |
| (4.5)  HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews"   First Impressions: First of all, thank you for not only including the contest this was written for but also the prompt - I’m always curious what inspired a story. It looks like you did a great job with it because this was quite an unusual birthday present. A more common one might have been underwear opened in front of the in-laws, or something along those lines. Here, the person giving the present went to great lengths to make it a good one, and she couldn’t even tell the narrator exactly what was going on because that would have ruined it. I could feel his concern when she got up to make a speech. If nothing else, it’s always safe to assume that a good friend would make it embarrassing! But she went even further, apparently not noticing that the judge was listening, which was unfortunate because it surely ruined the case… He took it well. I would have expected him to have a go at her for doing that, but he pretty much shrugged it off. As it happened, it all worked out okay, and I didn’t see the twist coming - I, like the narrator, figured she had made a mistake, but she was smarter than that.  Suggestions: The story was well written and I only noticed a couple of tiny errors: After all I had I believe there should be a comma after “all”. We try to be selective about who we chose to represent. “Choose”, present tense.  Final Thoughts: I liked the quote by Mark Twain. I had never heard it before but it was very clever. To be honest, I wasn’t sure how it and the whole paragraph related to the story, other than to explain a bit about lawyers in general and the narrator in particular, but it was interesting. The narrator came across very well in this story, as did his partner who seemed to have a sense of humour but at the same time had her wits about her (as one would expect from a lawyer). I’m sure the narrator appreciated this birthday present more than any other gift she could have got him. A good story, and a fun read!    My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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