Today I see a white gull dancing [E] Actual observation of an avian activity |
HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews" Greetings, Adherennium Plotting something! I am reviewing this because...well, it's your 3rd Anniversary at Writing.com today! First of all, my reviews are intended to be helpful and encouraging, not hurtful in any way. Use what you feel works for you, and leave the rest. The Positives/What I Liked I immediately loved this! Wow. I didn't realize you were such a talented poet! You also taught me something I did not know. Here in Michigan, with all the Great Lakes surrounding us, we have lots and lots of sea guls along our shorelines. I've watched them, of course, and even witnessed them steal food from someone's plate, but I've never observed this dance you've written about. Now you have me curious and I can't wait till I go camping again so I can experience this very thing! I had a hard time picking out the line(s) I liked best, but at last, I've chosen the following... drums his feet to beat the ground till the worms rise to see who is knocking? Great choice, too, on your font size and also your line breaks. And as always, I like poetry without punctuation (children's poetry is the exception.) This is such a wonderful piece! Did it make the Quills? I also love the title: Today I see a white gull dancing Suggestions/Comments to Consider I have no suggestions or recommendations, other than you should send this piece in somewhere so many others may enjoy it. Final Thoughts This is one of the best poems I've read in a long, long time. Thank you for sharing! Have a great day and... K e e p on W r i t i n g ! Cubby ")
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