Twilight of the Gods [E] Her Grace and a retainer face an insurrection. |
Hi Beholden , I am reviewing your short story, "Twilight of the Gods" , as one of the judges for March's official contest, "What a Character! : Official WDC Contest" . Thanks for entering, and good luck! This review is in affiliation with "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group" . Please remember any views are purely my own, and any advice is given with the sole intention of being helpful. What I liked: The story really captured my imagination. This is a very enjoyable story. The characters all had very distinct and memorable personalities, so, while it was John who took over the piece and became the hero of the story, the Duchess and the Old Duke were equally well painted. I love the Duchess's name: Jane de Saville Burnley Compton-Arden. That made me laugh. And the Old Duke is a great character, too. I love this: "Daily, it seemed that the Old Duke harumphed at some new aberration reported in the papers." I could picture him so clearly. I did wonder why the villagers agreed to march up to the Manor House. What could the person on his soapbox have said that convinced them to do this? I wasn't sure when the story is set, so I'm not entirely sure of the social context. (I'll be honest; even if I did know when it was set, I would have to do a little research to learn of the social situation at the time.) I love John. Whether it was because he was called John, and he was important to an old, female lady of nobility, I am not sure. But the relationship he had with the Duchess kind of reminded me of that between Queen Victoria and John Brown. This is a nice, easy relationship, and they both seem to have great regard for the other one. And John is brave. I love the way he stands up to the horde of people and persuades them to turn around, even making them feel guilty for marching. Suggestions: I'm not sure how you would fit this into the story, but I would have liked to know what John said to be able to persuade the villagers to turn around. Also, to have known their reasons for marching. I note you say the old blacksmith closed his workshop. Is this a part of the Industrial Revolution, or am I way off with that? Parting comments: I enjoyed this story a lot. You write compelling and sympathetic characters. Great work! Choconut
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