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Review #4740817
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The Feline and the Rodent  [13+]
Might also be called the Cat and the Rat.
by Noël Freeman
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)
A "Game of Thrones"  review from
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The views and opinions on this review are mainly the things discovered by the reader and therefore, do not reflect necessarily to the group, activity and/or event being affiliated herein. This is only the opinion and suggestions of the reviewer and it is still up to the author of this piece to consider this review as a corrective action or otherwise.


Hello Noël Freeman

As a (relatively recent) cat servant, I was drawn to this piece from the title and the image you added to it.

The intro line below the title is funny. You have such a sophisticated title and then the intro line kind of takes it backwards. On the other hand, there is nothing wrong with simply saying what you mean to say.

I hate to admit it, but the last line made me laugh. It's the cadence of the rhyme and the outcome for the annoyed rodent that elicits a chuckle even in the face of such a violent act.

Check out this sentence in the third stanza:

those shiny, spiky teeth of its can surely do a goring *Right* I can't tell you why or what, but this sentence just feels off. As if there is a grammatical turn in there that isn't quite correct. I get what the sentence means to say, but I had to read it a couple of times over to fully grasp the content. I think it's too flowery and loopy for this poem that is otherwise told in a very straightforward manner.

I have one cat who would totally hunt like that. And my other cat who wouldn't be able to catch either of those rodents. He's young though. He might still become a successful hunter. I don't let them walk outside without supervision though, so I'll never find out.

Annette
"The WDC Angel Army" 


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   *CheckG* You responded to this review 04/01/2024 @ 7:49pm EDT
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