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 Review #4736627 |
 | Life Moments  [ASR] Life and the moments we face in our married life..  |
| (4.0)| An Angel Army Review Hi sindbad . I'm JACE , and I have the honor of reading and reviewing your offering "Life Moments" . I invite your attention to the comments below. Please bear in mind these notes are from one on the outside looking in; ultimately only you can decide what's right for your story.  Overall Impression. I absolutely love this idea. What a great way to begin a marriage together. I wish I'd heard about this idea when my children married. Or for my marriage.I wasn't a big fan of the individual lines as paragraphs. This made it harder for me as a reader. This distracted me quite a bit. You dialogue read more like a script with the speaker being listed first. Using proper attributes such as Mother said, " ... " would be easier to follow.  Technical and Editorial Considerations. In this section I normally list those areas that relate specifically to the mechanics of your writing--punctuation, grammar, spelling, etc. Except for the aspect with using paragraphs, I found no other issues with punctuation or grammar.  My Rating. 4.0.  Thank you for sharing this offering. Please accept these comments as offered in friendship and support. They are but my humble opinion.Reviewed by JACE   My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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You responded to this review 03/12/2024 @ 9:09am EDT