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Review #4735278
Viewing a review of:
 Shift Open in new Window. [13+]
Two lives cross paths amidst a dark, life changing night.
by Eight-7 Author Icon
Review of Shift  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)
Greetings and thank you for requesting a review *HeartT*

A brief and striking glimpse into the lives of two people who left an impact on each other. You’ve described the young lady’s sordid origins and the role the former officer played in clear and memorable words. We see what feels to me a bit like the tables have turned, as if the man needed to see her happiness at that moment in the diner in order to rescue himself from a potential downward spiral.

This is grim yet optimistic, as we see that even the most hopeless case can be saved. We don’t see how much further interaction there had been between the two after he rescued her; was there any chance she recognized him at the diner and understood who he was? Or was it all on his end? This feels almost biographical.

I usually suggest using size 4 Verdana font to ensure readability across devices. Other than that simple formatting tip, I don’t see anything wrong with this piece. It stands as a powerful vignette of the positive influence one person can have on another, even with a fleeting encounter.

Thanks for sharing, take care and keep writing *Smile* *Writing*


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