I like the kindness your story shows through the storyteller, Micha. The plot, scenes, characters, and setting are believable because they relate to real-life events. I can understand and visualize your story easily.

The possibilities of adding to this story are possible. I hope you will consider creating more story information.

Genres that would help potential readers find this story could be drama because it is a drama about people's lives and how they are affected by events, emotional because your story has emotions included and could have more as it is expanded, friendship because it tells about friends helping, inspirational, or other genres.

KNOCKED OUT: why by what or who? This is a possible means for expanding your story by explaining about the situation. Showing emotions and actions will add to the realism.

[I showed up to his room] You could rearrange this sentence and use the word . How did this character feel about his friend being hurt and in the hospital?

[it became regularity] Rewriting this sentence will make reading the story easier for the reader. When I read this, I lost the flow of my reading and had to restart again. By changing some words and rearranging them you would be able to make the meaning of this sentence clearer, give the reader a smooth reading experience, and keep them focused on your story.


Please let me know if you have any questions.

Thank you for writing and for sharing your word art with me and WdC members.

My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .