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Review #4712768
Viewing a review of:
 Taking the Leap Open in new Window. [18+]
The milestone my characters face is deciding to move from just friends to more...
by 💙 Carly- Hello 2025 Author Icon
Review of Taking the Leap  Open in new Window.
Review by Beholden Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)
This is a well written, competent tale of a young woman who leaves for the big city, misses her male friend, and decides to return. Naturally, once back together, they're able to admit their love and begin their romance. It's not exactly the most original plot out there but, in this genre, that's not important. What matters are the characters and whether the reader cares about them.

And this story does exactly that - the antagonist, Arlynn, has had a previous romance that turned out badly, so is wary of involvement. Plenty of readers will identify with that. She wants Ryan, her friend, to remain at arm's length but her time in the city teaches her that's not enough for her. We cheer for her as she drives back home.

Ryan is handsome, kind, sensitive and thoughtful - naturally the good guy in the tale. And when they're back together, the story has a happy ending. The writer knows what the market wants and provides it, and that's all that's required.

There are a few points I need to make, however. There are a couple of typos and this sentence has an error: "She had just past the sign..." - That should be "...had just passed..." I know, they sound the same.

Then there's presentation. The font is small and, to allow readers with poor eyesight to have no problems, you would do best by increasing its size by a step. One of your choices for genre is Other, which tells prospective readers nothing and doesn't attract readers who search for particular genres. Choose another that has some relevance to the story and mention the contest either in the header or in a Note at the end of the text.

And that's it. Thanks for a pleasant read.

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Printed from https://writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4712768