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 Review #4712745 |
  |  | Poetry is...  [E] an absurd encounter with fear.  |
| (5.0)| Dear Dave ,Thank you for being the first to enter an offering in this month's contest. It's a pleasure to consider your poetry for feedback. Sorry I took the summer off before judging. My initial thoughts on first read: I was particularly moved by the impactful third stanza with so much imagery that it made me want to slow down, as with a car ride, to take it all in. Also appreciate how the poem ended on a nostalgic feeling, reminding me life is linear and our early experiences like grandma's dishwater bucket come back distinctly, vividly last black and white film perfectly framed. Overall: Your poem beautifully captures the essence of poetry as a medium to convey emotions, experiences and perspectives. The piece invites readers to explore the multi-faceted nature of poetry, celebrating its ability to paint word pictures that resonate with the heart and soul. One noteworthy aspect is its vivid imagery. You masterfully use metaphors and similes to compare poetry to various experiences in life, such as dancing, capturing fleeting moments, and acting as a prism. This approach engages the reader's senses and emotions, making the poem an evocative journey through the essence of poetry. Truly appreciate the choice of a conversational and accessible writing style. The poem feels like a heartfelt conversation with the reader, inviting them to reflect on a myriad of ways poetry can be experienced in everyday life. This approach makes the poem relatable and inviting to a wide range of readers. Two points I might make could further enhance the focus of the poem: 1. Clarity of Message: While the poem beautifully illustrates the diverse facets of poetry, it could benefit from a more explicit central message or theme. Providing a clear focal point or takeaway for the reader would make the poem even more impactful. Not that it's necessary. 2. Structure and Consistency: While the poem employs the contest requested free verse style, ensuring a consistent structure or pattern, such as a regular rhyme scheme or meter, could enhance the flow and musicality of the piece while demonstrating further what poetry does/is. If you were to go in another direction. This would likely create a reading experience that was even more harmonious. This was a heartfelt and eloquent exploration of the essence of poetry. It successfully celebrates the diverse ways in which poetry mirrors life and human experiences. To improve the focus, if you think needed, consider refining the central message and introducing more structural consistency. Nevertheless, your ability to convey the beauty of poetry in such a relatable manner is praiseworthy that resonates colorfully expressions of the love for this art form we choose. I thought about how this could introduce a chapbook of poetry or be used amid a series of poems like an interruption to take a moment to consider, giving one a moment to celebrate poetry in this light. It was so good to have your entry and interest in the group and contest. I am honored to have your writing grace this activity and to be allowed consider it for feedback. I gave it a perfect score as it stands. Suggestions for improvement could apply to the poem or anything and are offered to help with approaches and perspectives of/on poetry as I grow as reviewer and poet who needs to turn the art form inside out and get all the lint from the lining of its pockets. I wax, Brian Super Power Reviewer   My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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You responded to this review 09/20/2023 @ 11:57am EDT