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Printed from https://writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4709627
Review #4709627
Viewing a review of:
  [OT On A Sumer's Day GIVE100}Stat 85  [E]
OT Link Item 2070912 My entry to give 100 E to inspirational 1974137} the final count.
by Mary Ann MCPhedran
Review by LightinMind
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)
Hello, Mary Ann MCPhedran . This is a review from "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group! *Smile* I received " [OT On A Sumer's Day GIVE100}Stat 85 via the random 'read & review' button. I have the following comments to offer.

*Quill*Reader Experience

The sun is shining and two lovers walk down an avenue of trees holding hands in a gentle breeze. Their eyes are shining and love is in the air.

*Quill*Commentary

This is my own reading of what you wrote, as it read to me, feel free to disagree with me.

Sometimes the simplest poems are the best. The rhyme was a little random and the tonal lengths were all of out sync but I liked the theme and it warmed my heart. Maybe love is also a little like that, it has its own rhythm and its own syllable counts. Most of us can recall such moments and they always make us smile.



*Quill*Mechanical issues

Not sure why you bothered with the full stops when you were using no commas. This was more Freeverse than structured.


Thanks for sharing.


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#2259390 by LightinMind


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