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Printed from https://writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4616764
Review #4616764
Viewing a review of:
 Ziggy  [E]
Just a memory
by Loretta Smart
Review of Ziggy  
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)
A new Anniversary Review signature to use, courtesy of [Link To User legerdemain]
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"The WDC Angel Army" 


Hallo,
I visited your portfolio as it's your WdC Anniversary.

A whimsical little poem about a love lost, but fondly remembered. The story is well told in simple language with a good rhyme and verse structure. I like the idea of not-missing-a-day coming back at the end, bringing it to a full circle.

Grammatically it should be 'time has gone' but I guess 'time is gone' takes a bit of poetic license and is allowed! Also, 'you're' out of sight or 'you' out of sight.

Maybe consider some WritingML like font, size, and center. Maybe even some color for the type.

Happy Account Anniversary!
Write on!

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