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Printed from https://writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4616608
Review #4616608
Viewing a review of:
 Dreams  [E]
Our deepest, inner desires manifested into a dream world
by VeryWell
Review of Dreams  
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: E | (3.5)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)
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Hallo!
This one showed up on Random Reads.
I'm wondering if it's a finished piece or a work-in-progress. You have a good concept going - that sometimes, desires appear in dreams, that it feels good for the duration of the dream and then reality kicks in. You give an inspiring message that one should work to make that the reality.

It feels a bit unfinished. I would have liked to read some examples. Maybe something like this has happened in your life or in the life of a family member or friend ...? Their dream came true because they worked for it ... ? Also, something a bit more concrete about how to go putting it into practice.

I'd suggest you pick some 'genres', since 'none' doesn't show up on searches and your work gets less exposure on site. Also, for the layout, maybe some line-spacing, font and size.

This piece has a good core thought. Develop it and it has the potential to be great.

Write On! Dream On!
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Printed from https://writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4616608