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Printed from https://writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4614651
Review #4614651
Viewing a review of:
 Unlikely Friend  [E]
Unexpected friendship that you now can't live without
by Smartie
Review of Unlikely Friend  
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)

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Hallo!
This one showed up on Random Reads.

I really like this simple, free verse poem about how a friendship grew and what it means to you now. I think many of your readers will be able to relate to it, too.

I usually don't ask poets to change punctuation, since they've expressed themselves in their style -- but here, I'd say please put a full-stop after 'no use', otherwise it runs into the next line and becomes confusing.

I'm also guessing the 'club' came a few years later. Maybe a one-line space between, to show the passage of time?

The poem works well as is, I just think these tweaks would enhance it.

Maybe you'd also like to try using some WritingML like font and center.

Thanks for sharing this!
Write On!



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   *CheckG* You responded to this review 08/17/2021 @ 1:34am EDT
Printed from https://writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4614651