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 Review #4568947 |
 |  | I Write In 2020  [E] This book contains prose writings and poetry for various contests here on WDC.  |
| (4.5)  Greetings, 💙 Carly: poems & novel! I found this treasure on the Newsfeed this morning and decided to give it a review.  First of all, my reviews are intended to be helpful and encouraging, not hurtful in any way. Use what you feel works for you, and leave the rest.What I Liked  Life's Journey is a beautifully written free verse poem which begins from birth and ends as the final curtain falls. I've many favorite lines in this piece of which I will name a few below. every changing, yet remaining the same The internal rhyme works wonderfully in Line 8. I think Line 14 struck me the most: Leaving an echo Wow. I never thought of our lives after the curtain drops (Line 13) as an echo, but that is exactly what it is. I'll never forget that. It's so true, as all that is left is an echo of our lives... a legacy honored by others. This is quite a piece, Carly. Very nicely written. I also like that you centered this. It reminds me of a curtain dropping.How this made me feel... A lovely piece that tugged at my soul. Life goes by much too quickly.Suggestions to Consider Line 15: of once was Did you, by chance, leave out the word what? of what once was Just an observation but I noticed at the beginning that a few of your lines began with capital letters and again toward the end. I wasn't sure if you did this on purpose or not, but thought it worth mentioning, at least.Final Thoughts As I grow older, I think more about that curtain dropping someday and I'll no longer be here. I don't dwell on it, but I do ponder. Something I just now noticed about this piece is that it's full in the middle, which represents our life as it blossoms. It begins, as you say, in quiet solace, blossoms as it takes on a dimension of its own and then dwindles as the curtain drops. This is such a beautiful piece. I hope you do well with it in the contest! I wouldn't be surprised if you took 1st Place with this. Best of luck! Have a great day and... K e e p on W r i t i n g ! Cubby ")
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You responded to this review 09/06/2020 @ 5:30am EDT