Reviewing this as a fellow participant in "I Write in 2019"  [E]

First impression: I looked at the contest to see what the taboo words were, so I can say: creative non-use of them

Suggestions:

the sentence They were the best, but still the same wild group we’d been for years. - as the previous sentence begins with "the gifts," this sentence's first word is a pronoun with an ambiguous antecedent. I know it refers to the other women, but that's not apparent until later in the sentence.

but being in a fancy hotel's private room I’d never been in I'd suggest editing this so as not to repeat the word "in."

It wasn’t what I expected at all. I suggest avoiding sentences with linking verbs. Instead, show this by her reaction or the other women's responses to her reaction.

Opening: Fairly strong; opening with dialogue works. Maybe a bit too heavy on the backstory in the first paragraph - some of that is not needed. Also see suggestions above.

Ending: I liked how you avoided a taboo word with the "kiss" action. Satisfying ending all around, in many senses of the word.

Overall: A short scene, but well-executed. Can't speak to the contest requirements, but it's a good idea and, apart from the few suggestions I listed above, it works.

You responded to this review 09/10/2019 @ 1:11am EDT

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