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Review #4425928
Viewing a review of:
 Exhaustion Open in new Window. [E]
What does a wife do when she finds out about her cheating husband?
by xyz_and_abc Author Icon
Review of Exhaustion  Open in new Window.
Review by A Non-Existent User
Rated: E | (4.0)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)
*All parts of reviews are just my opinion and never meant to belittle or demean the author. You, and only you, know how you want to write the story.

I enjoyed this piece of writing. It flowed nicely for the most part. I felt your characters exhaustion and almost resigned defeat. I also liked how you did a bit of a dream sequence in there when she closed her eyes. Well done!

In the first paragraph; ending sentence, "Soon she would again have to change her posture" doesn't quite sound right. Perhaps maybe switching it around may make more sense-such as She would soon have to change her posture, once again" or something like that.

I really liked the descriptions you gave in the second paragraph.

Third Paragraph: There is a sentence problem with the 5th and 6th sentences. "She was holding her husband’s white shirt. She had taken in out from the laundry bag. " I believe a comma should separate these two sentences instead of having two sentences.

The 6th sentence "She had taken in out from the laundry bag" I am assuming you meant to say "She had taken it out from the laundry bag".

There is a typo in the word "pink" in the 3rd paragraph, 9th sentence. It is spelled wrong.

I am looking forward to reading more of your work. Keep writing!!

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   *CheckG* You responded to this review 07/28/2018 @ 4:13am EDT
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