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Given: Feb 27, 2017 at 4:44pm
Length: 1,503 Characters |
1,314 w/o WritingML
Just a reminder I am here to review and give suggestions. Any of which are my opinion and you can use them or not. Both are given with reverence for your style of writing and hope to help not just you but myself as well. If you have any questions about the review or suggestions don't be afraid to reply, email, or IM me in response. We are all learning to be better writers, including myself.
Good Points:
I think the poem went very well with the prompt and was written well too. I enjoyed an unexpected twist.
Grammatical Problems?
There were no grammatical problems I could see, nor tripped me up.
Overall Characterization and World View:
The characterization and world view of the poem was very good and went with the prompt of the contest.
Suggestions:
I only have one suggestion. It is with regards to the format. I'm not sure if you meant to have the second half of your poem strung together, but it is a bit distracting. I can see where pauses are meant to be and (personally) it would be great to see those if you put them into stanzas.
Last but not Least:
On the whole a well written poem and I enjoyed the story told within it. A good effort for the Dark Dreamscapes Contest and I wish you luck
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