Tales from the Players 1 [E] The introduction to the "Tales from" series that I recently started. |
Story ~ Two friends sit on a park bench mulling over life and discussing how random things that happen in the world are. Characters ~ Tim likes to ponder everything going on around him, tries to dig deep and figure out if there are patterns or not. T has a sense of humor, but loves to try and prove Tim wrong, if possible, and goes out the way to do so. Issues ~ "Everything. It’s all random." Still fixated on whatever he was looking at "You see them over there?" He pointed to the old couple. <--this can go one of two ways. ," he said still fixated...or ...whatever he was looking and said, "You see [line break]"Yeah, I see em', what does that have to do with random?" "Just look at them, they're so happy together and they've probably been together for a long Time, I bet they think they're <--no cap on Time and it the sentence is broken up. "Ok, you're probably right about that one but, I don't see <--comma goes before 'but' he turned back to look at the old couple <--capitalize He Impressions ~ It's an interesting concept. Writing conversations can be a little bit difficult. Think about adding more dialog tags as well as T's thoughts on things. Does T react to what Tim is saying? Show that. What's the weather like? Is the grass dying or a vibrant green. use description to really pull your reader in so that they can picture the scene as if it were playing out like a movie in their mind. You have five senses you can incorporate into your writing. The more you add, the more well rounded the story becomes. {c} "Game of Thrones" by Gaby
|