(Chapter originally written by worstfailure)
You laid on your back, looking up at the ceiling as it went around in nauseating circles above you. You were so afraid you'd throw up in the kitchen of Diane's Diner that you were almost grateful when you realized your mouth was sealed shut. You were so disoriented from being sucked into the vortex of the mixers, scrubbed up and down various pots and pans, then mashed and kneaded in cookie dough, that your vision couldn't stop spinning. You'd been tossed around so much, so fast that for a second you didn't realize where you were until you felt the sticky substance around you, completely covering your mangled body, all except for part of the left half of your head, leaving only your nose and one of your eyes exposed. You realized with a sudden surge of panic that your body had been left behind in the cookie dough!
The world was still spinning and you didn't want to move, but you knew it'd be far more disastrous for you if you winded up baked, sold and eaten! You struggled, but the colossal goop of homemade dough was too tough to break through! It was too thick and your body was too stretched out and weak! You felt vibrations that came from footsteps and watched as Ashley stood over the tray proudly. You struggled, screamed and even blinked for help but of course the red-headed, air-headed beauty remained oblivious to your presence. The dough cemented your body in place and you mouth was sealed and buried with the rest of you. To Ashley, you were just one of countless other cookies on the tray she was taking to the oven. Realizing your destination you redoubled your efforts but it was all useless.
Humming a tune she thought went "Someone's in the kitchen at Diane's", Ashley opened the oven. You could feel the waves of heat wash over you even before Ashley lowered the cookie tray and placed it on a shelf inside the oven. She shut the door and you, along with all the other baked goods, were subjected to the blistering 350 degree heat.
You'd never been set on fire before. One of the few mercies life had granted you. But as your skin bubbled like an egg in a skillet and you felt blinding, white-hot pain like you'd never before experienced in your life, you realized this was the next worst thing. The only sliver of luck you were given was that this experience was so uniquely painful, you passed out after five minutes.
Ashley kept humming the misremembered song as she prepared a breakfast order that'd just come in. Idly, she wondered if she could convince Jenna's cute brother to share a bite of her cooking later. After all, the quickest way to a person's heart was through their stomach.
-----
"One, like, Adam and Eve on a raft with, like, a brick, hot blond in sand, sweepings in the alley, and, like, a Jayne Mansfield with cow paste 86'd the machine oil."
"Uh, thanks, Ash," Jenna said, having absolutely no idea what her friend said as she accepted the order for table 11. Where her best friend had learned to talk like a veteran short-order cook, Jenna had no idea. As Jenna placed the eggs, hash, pancakes, and coffee on a tray, she carefully inspected each item for any sign of you, just like she'd done with every dish Ashley prepared. Sighing when she couldn't find any sign of you, she delivered the order and noticed some treats were missing in the glass dome of the display case on the counter.
Once she was back behind the counter, Jenna called into the kitchen, "Hey, Ash, we're running low on cookies."
"On it!"
As soon as Ashley finished speaking, the timer went off with a ding, and Ashley popped open the oven. A dozen giant cookies, each looking more delectable than the last were before her. Ashley sniffed the intoxicating aroma, her mouth salivating at the mere sight of them. She felt her tummy gurgle and regretted she'd only had a grapefruit for breakfast this morning. Sad that she couldn't treat herself to even one, she put the tray down, grabbed a spatula and began prying the cookies off the tray and on to a plate for her bestie to stick in the display case.
"Here you go, Jenna," Ashley said, handing her friend the plate of delicious treats with a wistful expression.
As soon as Ashley's back was turned, Jenna scanned the cookies and this time she was rewarded with the sight of your little eye blinking feebly from the middle of a field of chocolate chunks of one cookie. Your eye and nose were all that were visible on the surface of the baked good, your skin still red from your time in the oven. You tried to give your sister a pleading look with your only visible eye.
"Hey there, big brother," Jenna said in a whisper, smiling mercilessly at you. "Guess you had a rough time in the kitchen, huh? Oh well... that's the way the cookie crumbles!"
Giggling at her own joke, Jenna...
1) Took the cookie you were in and stashed it somewhere for later. She planned on giving it to Ashley during her break, claiming it was a gift from you.
2) Left you where you were as she stuck the plate of cookies in the display.
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