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  1. Silvia and Sarcasm Don’t Mix
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Rated: XGC · Interactive · Adult · #2276919
You’re 4-in tall, and your ‘normal-size’ caretaker decides you need to start dating!
This choice: Silvia and Sarcasm Don’t Mix  •  Go Back...
Chapter #2

Silvia and Sarcasm Don’t Mix

    by: G-Writer Author IconMail Icon
Just as you began to wonder what Lillie’s plan had been if you were stood up, everyone’s eyes were suddenly drawn to a woman entering the theater.

This woman was almost impossibly pretty, with perfect facial features (even without a speck of make-up), wondrously glossy straight black hair that cascaded down past her shoulders, and eyes that were so spectacularly ice blue that you felt yourself get cold just looking into them for too long. As if this all wasn’t enough to draw every eye in the room, the woman was statuesque in height at over 6 feet tall… and as if THAT wasn’t enough… the woman was the very definition of exaggerated hourglass, with an emphasis on exaggerated. E-cup breasts, a 30 inch waist, and an easily 50 inch set of hips (and matching thighs) were all somehow wrapped in a futuristic-looking zip-up bodycon dress that was a cream color that looked almost tan against her pale skin, the material following every inch of her curves as if it was literally sown onto her instead of being zipped together. Needless to say, you weren’t the only one who couldn’t help but stare, so you were more than surprised when the woman made a beeline… straight to you.

“Hello, I assume you are Kyle? Or do you prefer Ky?”

You were so shocked that Lillie somehow even knew a woman like this, let alone set you up on a date with her, that you almost didn’t register that she was talking to you, let alone that her somewhat blunt/robotic speech pattern didn’t really match what people would guess. “Oh, umm, Ky is fine. Or whatever nickname you come up with, really.”

“Oh? You don’t mind? I will do my utmost to come up with a suitable nickname in the near future then. My name is Silvia. I am also known as ‘Silly-V’, ‘Giant Chick’, and ‘That girl who’s insanely hot but is as emotional as a can of tuna’, or at least that is what I have heard multiple people address me as. I… admit that I do not like these nicknames any more than I understand how they apply to me. I feel I must also admit, I am at a loss as to how I should go about a date like this. I have not interacted with many Minis, and I do not have very good experiences with dating in general. Are you uncomfortable as well?”

Laughing nervously and very quickly understanding what people were getting at by their ‘nicknames’ for Silvia, you couldn’t help but let out a sarcastic retort, a habit you found yourself always leaning on whenever you felt nervous or embarrassed (and you had a inkling you would constantly be feeling those emotions while around Silvia). “Ah, no actually, I love putting myself under the care of random women I’ve never met before… Haha.”

You expect Silvia to at least smile or laugh off your comment, but instead she seems to seriously contemplate what you’ve said. “Truly? Understood. I suppose I’m willing to try… taking you under my care. I hope to live up to your expectations.”

“Uh… yeah…” You can only stare back at Silvia. Was she joking as well? Or… she didn’t seriously think—

“Without further ado then, let us start this date. And since I already have your permission to take care of you…” Before you could ask what you meant, Silvia smoothly picked you up in one hand, cupping her other hand over top of you like a protective roof. You couldn’t see it, but the suspecting glare she started giving everyone around her quickly made them move away, as she effectively gave off the message that you were HERS, having taken your comment at full face value.

Silvia very nearly made the concession stand employee cry with all of her glaring as she ordered a huge bucket of popcorn (completely drowned in butter, you noticed) and a literal bucket (handle included) of soda. You finally noticed the glares Silvia was giving everyone as she was forced to move her hand from above you to carry the popcorn/soda, but you quickly decided to just let her do her thing.

Before long, she carried you to a random theater, where you realized that you actually didn’t know what movie you were going to. Whichever one it was, it wasn’t very popular, because no one else was there and it didn’t look like anyone else would be joining you. “I hope you enjoy Space Battles; they are replaying a classic, Revenge of the Stick.”

“Wow… you like Space Battles? I’m impressed, not a lot of people even know that series, let alone the spin-off title! It’s one of the best!”

To your surprise, it seemed Silvia was more nerdy than her appearance would ever suggest, and you actually seemed to be into the same stuff. A smile that looked quite awkward on Silvia’s usually robotic face crept across her features, apparently happy with your response. She had been about to set you in the seat next to her, but seemed to think better of it and set the soda there instead and you on her decidedly pillowy thighs, plopping the butter-smeared bucket of popcorn next to you in her lap.

As the movie started with previews, you found that Silvia and you were able to talk pretty easily about various points of the Star Battles universe, and even with the original awkwardness, you seemed to be having a pretty good time. As the movie started, Silvia took this moment to daintily grab a few pieces of popcorn to begin eating. Looking at the bucket beside you, you noticed that the popcorn had been drowned in so much butter, you couldn’t help but wince as it actively started seeping through the bucket, no doubt permanently staining Silvia’s dress.

Following your eyes, Silvia quickly noticed the growing stain, a slight groan escaping her lips as her face snapped back to its usual robotic blankness. “Oh dear, it seems I’ll have to throw out this dress after our date. I hope you won’t mind continuing the date with my slobbish appearance…”

Thinking it was laughable that anyone could ever think of Silvia as slobbish, you couldn’t help but retort without much thought. “Haha, don’t worry about it Silvia. Didn’t you know? Minis love slobbish girls the best anyway.”

You laughed, trying to make Silvia feel better, but she seemed to look at you rather quizzically, before another awkward smile crept onto her face. “I was… unaware that Minis like you were attracted to such things. I will do my best to more accurately meet your preferences.”

You again looked at Silvia in confusion, but by this time she was already grabbing huge handfuls of near-soggy popcorn, and… quite mechanically shoving them into her mouth. By the time she was only a few handfuls through, she had popcorn residue all over her lips, had dribbled popcorn and butter down the front of her dress, and had made it some kind of point to stop using napkins and instead wipe her butter-smeared fingers off on her dress right next to you.

More than a little put off, you decided to ask what was up with her sudden change of behavior, although you weren’t quite sure how to ask. “Silvia, umm… listen, the popcorn… well—“

“Oh, do not worry, I no longer mind butter and popcorn getting onto this dress. It is… quite nice to not have to worry about it. If I had known Minis liked girls like this, I might have dated one sooner.”

“Uh… actually, no. I meant—“

“Oh, would you like some?” Talking right over your attempts to explain yourself, Silvia grabbed some popcorn to give to you… only to stop in sudden thought. “Oh, I suppose I should inquire: is there anything Lillie does while feeding you? Do you have any special needs?”

Your thought process was cut short at the thought that Silvia didn’t think you could even feed yourself. With the frustration of being talked over as well as indignant feelings at being thought of as helpless like that (a defensiveness you still hadn’t gotten over after being shrunk, even if it made sense for her to ask), you once again responded without thinking. “Oh definitely, she pre-chews all my food for me before feeding me by hand! And if I’m especially good, she even adds extra spit!”

For once, a look a pure surprise crossed Silvia’s face. “Oh my… what an unfortunate way to have to eat. Thank you for teaching me all of these new things about Minis. I must admit, I am surprised that you prefer MORE spit than is required, but I suppose I do not mind being accommodating.”

You blanched at Silvia’s words, not fully believing that someone would be oblivious (and/or gullible) enough to actually take seriously what you had said, but she immediately began chewing up a bunch of popcorn, presumedly for you. “Silvia, that’s not—“

“Oh, yes!” Silvia easily spoke right over you, spewing chewed popcorn down onto you as she talked. “I have thought of a nickname that is appropriate for you. As I have your permission, I will call you my Baby Bird from now on. If I think of any other names, I will be sure to tell you. Now, please be a good Baby Bird and eat your popcorn.”

To your disgust, Silvia nonchalantly dug a huge glob of pre-chewed popcorn, somehow more saturated with spit than butter, and broke off a chunk… before literally shoving it in your face, presumedly to ‘hand feed’ you. Unfortunately, when you opened your mouth to protest, all you got for your efforts was Silvia shoving the tip of her finger with the chewed popcorn into your mouth, holding it there until you were forced to chew and swallow it or choke/suffocate. The taste was… horrible. The popcorn had already been soggy from the butter, but now it was chewed up and saturated with so much spit that you were tasting much more spit than butter, let alone popcorn. To make matters worse, Silvia seemed to enjoy feeding you like this now that she was over the inherent strangeness of it, and before you could recover from the disgust of the first mouthful, she was already shoving another into your mouth.

“I must admit, I… I quite enjoy this, Ky. And I’m glad to see you are enjoying my technique as well. I was afraid I might have to ask Lillie for pointers, but I see that is not the case. Although, I may have to ask her other ways for me to be more slobbish… I believe she is much more experienced in that area.”
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