As the sadistic, super-sized toddler crams you into a detailed small-scale model 1927 Ford Touring car, you begin to wonder if you'll ever again see the light of day. Will this mammoth child of mind-shattering proportions destroy you? Before your mind can answer its own questions, your stomach is violently lodged into your throat as the model car you are occupying is being driven in a rapid circle, speeding up constantly and spinning out of control. "Yay!!! Fast car, fast car! Vroom Vroom, GOOO!!!!" The child sqeals in complete joy as you are put through nightmarish levels of mortal agony that no human mind could comprehend. Finally, the ride stops, and you stagger out of the tiny car, losing your lunch all over the giant boy's wooden desk. "Hehehe!!! You're funny, little car man! I'm gunna call you Little Tony!!!"
"But kid," you begin in a queasy half-gasp, the gigantic world still spinning around you. "My name isn't Tony, muh---my name is Juh---Jake." Before you can finish your sentence however, your youthful captor snaps back "YOUR NAME IS LITTLE TONY AND YOU'RE BEING BAD, LITTLE TONY!!!!!" In a rage, the child joins his index finger and thumb together in front of your face and half-playfully, half-angrily flicks you on your forehead. As your head rocks back and vibrates from the shock, pain jolts through your entire nervous system. Truly, this must be what Hell is like.
Finally, a blessing from above. A voice...a female voice...saves you. "Craig, you come down here this instant! Your breakfast is getting cold!!!" The child instantly responds and gallops cheerfully down the hallway and to his awaiting family, leaving you unattended and with at least a partial chance for escape. Your attention turns back toward the toy car, that cute and comically dated '27 touring car, and you realize that with the right parts and a few alterations, you may be able to modify it into a working automobile! But what if it doesn't work? Is it worth the risk?!?!
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