The pen feels heavy in your grip. You were literally signing a deal with the devil, and you're pretty sure Sunday school classes taught you that this kinda thing was a no-go. Of course, those lessons always felt more allegorical than this...
"He's lying to you."
You look up, and see a tall woman in flowing white robes. She smiles, a radiant smile that complements her perfect, flawless face, he grin doubling when the demon turns and sees her.
"I am not lying. Everything I've said so far has been truthful." The words are directed towards you, but his eyes, and his grimace, never leave the woman.
She spreads her arms, her piercing blue eyes locked onto yours. "A lie by omission is still a lie in the eyes of our Lord."
Oh shoot, does she mean capital-G god? The idea of the divine creator of all being tied into this whole affair hadn't even occurred to you, despite the literal demon from hell. You look towards the devil, who was now looking sheepishly at you. "W-what does she mean by that?"
"There's no hell, I wasn't lying."
"But, but there's something else?" This was all starting to get out of control.
The woman, still smiling that glowing grin of hers, speaks up. "Sins do not go unpunished, and unclean souls do not taint the domain of our Lord."
"...What?"
"Purgatory," the devil says, sighing. "You people got a bit confused there for a while, and while eternal torment isn't a thing, Purgatory is. You sin in life, then if you want to go through the pearly gates you've gotta let your soul be cleansed. And it's not a pleasant sort of cleaning, more steel wool than wash cloth, if you get what I mean."
"So... if I had signed that contract..."
"Nothing would have happened! Listen, I already told you, I hadn't lied. It's just..." He pauses, then looks towards the woman. "Well, I suppose the angel can explain it best."
Angel? you think, realizing just what you've been talking to.
"The kingdom of our Lord is pure and unblemished. If one's soul is to continue on, it cannot be allowed to stain the sanctity of His divinity."
The devil slapped his forehead. "She means you can't go to the afterlife with too many sins." You open your mouth to ask a question, but he cuts you off. "And, that means no reincarnation without going through Purgatory, because-"
"Because all souls, cursed or blessed as they may be, must first pass through Heaven."
"Unless!" He says, stepping in front of the angel, "Unless you take me up on my offer to work for me. In fact," he says, grabbing the contract and very quickly changing some lines, "I'll sweeten the pot. Look, see, if you sign here then the moment you die you'll start work for me. No Purgatory, no punishments, no reincarnation, just a rewarding job you can really enjoy." He's smiling now, but the expression looks strained and his eyes don't smile with him.
Still, it's a tempting offer. "Is what he said all true?"
The angel's smile dims, but does not go out. "His words are honeyed but honest. I must advise against such actions, however. Heaven's realms turn their backs to those who do the same."
What is she on about? Shaking your head, you look down at the contract. It offers such power... and a ticket out of an afterlife of punishment? "Okay," you say, clenching your eyes. "I've decided." Looking at first the angel, then at the devil, you sigh. "Give me the pen. I'll do it."
The demon shouts with glee. "Ha! It's a good deal for both of us, isn't it. In your face, lady!"
She's not smiling, however. Her face suddenly looks a whole lot fiercer. "This choice of yours was a mistake you will regret." Her eyes fade to pure white, her body sprouting wings of pure light. You fall to the ground, cowering.
"W-w-what's happening? What are you-" You're cut off as a pillar of light slams down from above. You scream, agony coursing through you as your flesh melts from your bones, and in an instant, you die.
"Oh, come on! I earned that soul, damn it, and you know that." The devil pouted, holding the unsigned clipboard in his hands. The angel, smiling once more, patted his shoulder.
"Take solace in knowing that he will not enjoy what's to come."
"... What are you going to do to him?"
She turns, and vanishes, her last words drifting on the empty wind, lingering long after she was gone.
"A punishment to fit the crime."