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Printed from https://writing.com/main/interactive-story/item_id/1679158-The-Fartmeisters/cid/1437803-Come-Have-Coffee-Sweetie
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Rated: 13+ · Interactive · Other · #1679158

The everyday lives of a family of women with foul smelling and destructive flatulence.

This choice: The phone rings  •  Go Back...
Chapter #5

"Come Have Coffee Sweetie!"

    by: TheNewJaxson Author IconMail Icon
The phone rang and Julie picked up. “Hey Julie!” It was Gladys. “When you were outside did you notice how all my trees have no leaves next to yah house?”

Julie held her breath for a second trying to think, which was made all the harder by Gladys’s annoying voice, it was like Lois Griffin’s voice only more nasally. “I can’t say that I did,” Julie replied hoping that would end the conversation.

“Huh, funny that all my leaves would fall and your trees are looking healthy as evah,” Gladys commented confused.

“Maybe it’s that open septic system?”

“Well whatevah it is I hope it doesn’t kill my trees!” Gladys laughed. “Hey. What are ya doin’ now? I got a little coffee made and I’m about to watch my stories, why don’t you come ovah and we’ll make the coffee Irish?”

“Well I have to shower, before the girls get home…” Julie trailed off hoping that Gladys wouldn’t be persistent. Her stomach was rumbling and grumbling nicely by this point.

“Ahh, come on! It’ll be fun! Besides I never see any othah women going in there. I’m beginnin’ to think you don’t got any friends!” And there it was, Gladys’s nosiness in full swing. But it was true, Julie didn’t really have any other friends and this wasn’t the first time Gladys had tried to reach out.

“I’m always encouraging the girls to make friends, time to take my own advice,” Julie thought to herself. “You know what? Give me a half hour to shower and change and I’ll be right there! Thanks Gladys!”

“Don’t mention it dahlin! See you soon!” A half an hour later Gladys heard a loud crack of thunder, followed by the sound of the doorbell. When she opened the door all she saw was Julie standing on her front stoop in a nice yellow sundress waving something away from her big behind. “Where’s the clouds? I thought I heard thundah?” Gladys asked scanning the sky and only seeing sunshine, “Oh! And that septic problem is gettin’ worse!”

“Yeah, it does smell worse,” Julie agreed blushing red. Julie couldn’t help but notice how Gladys’s body was almost that of a supermodel, with a decent heart shaped ass, and a lovely set of D-cup breasts. Her sky blue dress was tight and left little to the imagination, and went well with her black pointed pumps. Julie couldn’t help but laugh how it all contrasted with her thick glasses and tight fire engine red curls, and oversized hawk like nose. “Face of a stereotypical nerd, body of an angel,” Julie giggled to herself. “And I don’t know where the thunder came from. I was just as startled as you.”

“Well come in sweetie,” Gladys said friendly. She grimaced as Julie passed her; the smell surrounding her perky posterior was indeed strong. “Oh sweetie, I hate to tell you, but I think that smell is clinging to yah clothes!”

“Oh is it?” Julie blushed redder. “Hopefully some perfume will help,” she laughed nervously fishing some out of her bag. She sprayed it on her dress, particularly her ass and smiled as if it was all a big joke. Julie then turned around to see…
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