Chapter #69The Complicated Love Life of Lindsay Cho by: Seuzz   You're still in a daze when you come out of fourth-period English with Michael/Caleb trailing behind, until you're startled out of it by the sight of Bhodi and Paulina chatting with Andrew and his friends outside the cafeteria. "Hey, there you are," Paulina says as she puts her arm around you. It's a nice arm, and you get a thrill off it even as you stiffen under Andrew's open smirk.
"So we'll definitely see you over at Kaylee's after school?" he asks Bhodi. Bhodi brushes his hair back and says he'll try. Andrew pokes you in the shoulder. "You coming? Afterschool party."
"I've got homework."
"It's a homework party."
Elijah laughs. "No it isn't."
"Shut up, dumbass." To you: "I'll bring mine if you bring yours." Behind him, Aaron sniggers through his nose.
"Um—"
Paulina jumps in. "Bhodi and I are definitely going to be there," she tells you. "I'm gonna talk to Evie too."
You give up. "Sure, I'll figure something out." Andrew tells you that's awesome. Then he and his friends swagger off. He looks back at you over his shoulder as he goes.
You turn to Paulina, and your jaw drops.
She and Bhodi are kissing.
Oh, not intensely. There's obviously no tongue. But he is bending over her, and their noses are touching and their lips are brushing against each others'. You stare in shock for a solid five seconds, then rip your gaze away.
They're not at it long. They press fingertips together, push away, and Bhodi goes loping down the hallway, also glancing back over his shoulder at his girlfriend. Unlike Andrew, though, who smoothly made it around a corner, Bhodi bumps into the wall.
"Wow." You can't suppress the exclamation after he's gone. "PDA much?"
"That was hardly a PDA," she retorts.
Michael says, "It wasn't exactly private." His whinny startles you: you'd forgotten he was with you.
"Are you eating with us?" Paulina asks him. Her tone isn't exactly welcoming.
"Sure he is." You put your arm in his. "He's my speech partner." Paulina visibly sags.
You all three brought your own lunches, so you are able to get to a table right away. Paulina frowns as Michael gets his stilt-like legs tangled up in the stools while takes a seat.
"So I guess things are going great between you and Bhodi," you observe as you pull out a plastic tub of leftover goulash.
"Teh Body," she giggles. "Remember when we used to call him that?"
"It was all of five days ago."
"It was a month, Lindsay. It feels like a year. God, so much has happened recently!"
"So much fuck-uppery, you mean. God!" You glance around. "Speaking of which, have you seen those two assholes around?" (It feels like the right thing for Lindsay to say.) "Have they been getting up to any—?" You frown, for someone is tapping at your foot. "Is that you?" you ask Michael.
"Is that me what?"
"Stretching your legs."
"It's me stretching my legs," Paulina says.
"Well, so have you heard anymore about those two— What is wrong with you?" She's bumped into you again.
"What are you guys talking about?" Michael asks. He's jammed half a sandwich into his mouth, and a fat wad of grape jelly is hanging off the bottom of a cheek.
Oh. Paulina doesn't want you talking about Will and Caleb and their misadventures in front of the person she thinks is Michael. "Some assholes we got mixed up with," you mumble.
"What assholes? Wha'did they do to you?" Michael sits up very straight, his eyes hard and bright.
"Nothing," Paulina tells him. "Lindsay thinks everyone is an asshole."
"I do not!"
"Not even Andrew?"
"What?" Where did that come from?
"Andrew Webb. You don't think he's an asshole?"
You see your chance to get out of the trap that Andy and his friends have laid for you. "Andrew is definitely an asshole."
"But you're coming out to the party with him after class."
"I'm coming out with you. What the hell? Maybe I'll skip it."
"No you won't. You'll get a ride with me—"
"You can't make me!"
"It would be really nice, Lindsay. We're getting to be friends with them. You want to be friends with them, don't you?"
"Who's 'them'?"
"Andrew and Elijah and Aaron." Her voice turns stubborn. "Ethan. Kaylee. Leslie. Darrell." Her lips twitch. "Bradley."
You feel your eyes narrow. "That's a low blow," you hiss.
"Yeah, but don't you? Him and Ethan are, like, bee-eff-effs, you'd be hanging out with—"
"What does this have to do with Andrew?"
The question seems to catch her like a blow to the stomach. "Well, he's friends with Ethan too," she finally stammers.
"So set me up to do homework with Bradley—"
"You should really give Andrew a chance, Lindsay. He really likes you."
"Oh, God! And how do you know?"
"He was talking about you with Bhodi. They were all talking during soccer practice, and Andrew said—"
"And how did they get to be so friendly with each other? Bhodi and Andrew? I thought they, like, hated each other."
Again, you've caught her off guard. "They got it all patched up," she stammers. "I don't know how. They got together and talked things out."
You snort. "I do not imagine Andrew Webb talking his feelings out. I do imagine him pulling the legs and wings off flies, then burning them to death with a magnifying glass."
"Well, I don't know if they talked, Lindsay. Maybe they punched each other until they were friends. Whatever guy thing it is that guys do when they— Look, I don't know!"
Michael—who has been listening to all this with his sandwich halfway to his mouth and his mouth hanging open to receive a sandwich that can't complete its journey—raises his hand. "You know, I'm a guy. You could ask me."
"Shut up," you snarl.
But Paulina kicks you. "I'm sorry," you mumble. "What do you think?"
He looks between you and Paulina. His voice tightens. "I think you could do a lot better than with a jerk like Andrew Webb. If you're, you know—" He starts to redden. "If you're looking for, uh—"
"I think you could really hit it off with Andrew," Paulina says. She shoots Michael a frowny glance. "When he starts a sentence he can usually finish them."
"Oh." You roll your eyes. "So if he wants to ask me if I want to go off and screw in the bathroom, he can come right out and say, 'Hey Lindsay, wanna go lock ourselves in the bathroom and screw?'"
* * * * *
You insist on shutting down the topic after that, and Paulina is in a sour mood when you part. You follow Michael to his locker. "Make a point with those guys that I'm not going to go out with Andrew, okay?" you tell him.
"I'll do my best," Caleb mutters in a voice closer to his natural baritone. "But they seem pretty set on it. Paulina especially. I mean, Jesus!" He yanks a book from the bottom of the stack inside his locker, setting off a bookslide. "You think maybe it's Bhodi pushing the idea onto her?"
"It's not like her," you agree. "Not like Lindsay would expect from her," you add in an even lower voice. "Lindsay knows that Andrew's a creep and a lowlife, so Paulina would know better than to push him on her, even if Bhodi was pushing it on her."
Caleb sucks on a tooth. "You think maybe she's, uh, not herself?"
You flinch under the blow. "No! They'd never do that to Paulina!"
"You did it to Lindsay."
"That's different, I wasn't friends with Lindsay. Listen, set yourself up with them to go out to that party this afternoon. I'll get a ride with you. We'll talk about it on the way out."
"You're being a cock tease, man," Caleb says as he slams the locker shut. "First you don't want anything to do with me, now you're asking me to play chauffeur." The whine returns to his voice. "Come on, Lindsay, don't put me in the freaking friend zone."
* * * * *
But you're not able to talk to Caleb on the ride out because Evie comes and finds you just before last period to ask if she can get a ride with you out to Ethan's. Instinct takes over, and you agree to have Michael pick her up too.
You're alone in the back seat while Michael entertains Evie up front, so that gives you time to do a little planning ahead. You don't like the lay of the ground.
Andy and his friends have already tried to shove Caleb-as-Michael at you. Now they are trying to shove Andy-as-Andrew at you. Will they give up, or will you wind up having to fend off Justin-as-Ethan? Will they shuffle Caleb into Bradley and try to set up something there?
You're feeling hunted and cornered, until with an audible bark of relief—one that causes Evie to turn around and Michael to look in the rearview mirror—you realize that Andy and his friends have given you an escape route.
You have been impersonating Lindsay so as to neuter her, figuring that someone needed to keep an eye on her lest she figure out what was going on with her friends. But if they succeed in pairing Lindsay with a boyfriend—one of them—then they will be spying on her themselves, and you won't have to continue this charade.
But would it be safe to turn Lindsay loose? Maybe you should turn her into a golem, just to be sure.   indicates the next chapter needs to be written. |
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