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I hate fights. Hate, hate, hate. I've learned a lot about arguing, though, in the past couple of years. Like, how to listen to the other person and hear what they're trying to say, even in the heat of anger. How to say what you mean to say. How to control the impulse to throw insults. How to know when it's time to take a break. How to best come to a solution. How to figure out who wants solution, who wants resolution, and who wants reconcilliation (I always want reconcilliation, as does Jimmy, but the others are more into solution and resolution). How to do your part to get things sorted out when the fight involves multiple people (like three, or four, or the whole frickin' family). How to check up on family members who weren't involved in the fight but whose emotions might be in a turmoil anyway over the conflict that's been going on in the house. How to "kiss and make up" without masking the real issues. How to listen to your own feelings while also listening to other people's feelings. How to wrap someone around your little finger. How to think about the ethics of the latter. How to smile at the neighbors the next day even after you had the whole block awake with your screaming at three a.m. the night before. What does this make me? A champion debater? Mature? Experienced?
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