I like it. A strong antagonist has strengths, weaknesses, goals and motivations just like protagonists, and I feel like you've given this villain a credible motivation.
Would you tell parts of the story from Bother's perspective? Is the robot scared, or at least reacting to being kidnapped or reprogrammed or whatever in a way that mimics human fear? Empathy might give Jeannie grounds for developing a relationship.
All that said, try not to stress too much about how good or bad you feel your characters, settings, plots and other story elements are after each assignment. There's a reason we spend a whole month doing this. You have plenty of time to mull over and revise your ideas throughout October, and even then, you still have to write and then edit the book in November and beyond. Trust the process.
PS: I love your robot's name and the reason for it. I also love how smart and talented your teen main character is. I can't wait to see these characters developed.
The following section applies to this forum item as a whole,
not this individual post.
Any feedback sent through it will go to the forum's
owner, Brandiwynš¶.
Printed from https://writing.com/main/forums/message_id/3589828
All Writing.Com images are copyrighted and may not be copied / modified in any way. All other brand names & trademarks are owned by their respective companies.
Generated in 0.11 seconds at 10:08am on Nov 08, 2024 via server WEBX1.