Belated B'day Excuses: 200 wd contest

I've recently been studying Einstein - there are some very interesting theories to persue. But, of course, I never accept such things without seeing them for my own eyes. One that stuck out for me was the theory of relativity, such that 'the station leaves the train' is as apt a statement as 'the train leaves the station'. In testing this at work, I found out that no 'the hot coffee meeting the expensive-designer-suit' is in fact not the same as 'the expensive-designer-suit clothed boss meeting a hot chick for coffee'. A lost job, drycleaning bills and pounding headache later I learnt my lesson.

Unfortunately, I had already put this theory into play regarding your Birthday. I apologize for my misguided assumption that sending the card 15 days after your birthday meant 'your birthday was early'. I had hoped through this movement of your birthday, I could help you grow up a little faster - as you so sorely need.

Your exasperated, unemployed and un-prank-loving friend,
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