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Printed from https://writing.com/main/campfires/item_id/1652203-The-BIG-Joke
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by wraith Author IconMail Icon
Rated: GC · Campfire Creative · Fiction · Fantasy · #1652203
What happens when a group of kids decide to investigate an abandoned novelty factory?
[Introduction]
Five kids decide to explore a long deserted joke factory that holds a legend of being haunted. When the five mischief making youngsters decide to trespass, mischief ensues with them as the targets!
"Try to keep up you guys! We're almost there!"

"Yeah, don't make us laugh at you before we even get to this place!"

Tina and Tammy were the biggest bullies in St. Parkers Middle school. Tina was tall, blond, and well developed for a girl of fifteen. She was a cheerleader for the football team already, but had ambitions to be the head of the team. Tammy was a redhead, almost as tall as Tina and one of the richest girls in the school. One of those people who believe that any problem could be solved by throwing money at it.

Both girls had been best friends since the moment they met and each one agreed that, if used correctly, their gifts could make them the queens of the school. Since then, the girls had gained a reputation as bullies, tormenting anyone they had a mind to and today was a day to make some of the newest students miserable.

Trailing behind the two girls and hacking through the brush as best they could were two boys and a girl. All three had just recently began their lives as students at St. Parkers and had little idea of Tina and Tammy's reputation up to this point. There was Jeremy, a straight A student of twelve years, his best friend Marcus who had known Jeremy since they were both in elementary, and Jeremy's twin sister Anna.

"How the two of you talked me into this is beyond me." Anna said as she swatted another mosquito.

"Well we said we appreciated you coming along didn't we?" Marcus said sheepishly.

"And besides," Jeremy put in. "this doesn't sound too tough. All we have to do is spend a few hours in this place. I bet the legends surrounding this place are just a bunch of baloney."

The little band of kids had been traveling along a trail on the outskirts of town. It was avoided by most of the locals, and for good reason. The trail led to the old Gags a Plenty Novelty Factory, which hadn't be in operation in over sixty years. It was owned and managed by an eccentric and reclusive multi-millionaire who had dedicated his whole life to the perfection of the perfect joke. No one ever found out what it was, but he had been found dead with a ghastly smile on his face. With no one to run the factory most of the workers quit, but the rest left when people started hearing spooky laughter that seemed to be coming from the walls themselves.

Ever since then, no one had dared go near the factory. Tina and Tammy knew the story of course but naturally didn't believe it. On the other hand, it proved a great opportunity to get some laughs at the expense of the new students.

Finally the kids arrived at their destination. A massive, dark warehouse style of a building. Closed in by weeds, covered in cobwebs and every third window seemed to be broken. Truly a place to be haunted..
"So, umm, how exactly are we supposed to get in there, anyway?" Anna said, as she tried the front door and found it locked. "Looks like the front door is locked, so..."

"Well, duh, we use the side door!" Tina grinned, as she and Tammy bundled the trio of students 'round the side of the building. A particularly rusty door revealed itself to the group as they arrived. Tammy went over and pulled the rusty door open easily, dusting her hand off with a handkerchief afterwards. Jeremy, Marcus, and Anna peered into the darkness nervously, looking back and forth between each other, before Jeremy piped up. "...Not it!" he said. Marcus was about to object, but suddenly the three junior students found themselves being shoved through the doorway first. "You're all going in first, of course! Tammy shouted, before she and Tina had a laugh at their victim's expense. After several seconds, they proceeded to follow the others inside, and the door creaked itself shut behind them.

Ka-chunk. A dreadfully familiar sound came from the door...
Everyone, including Tina and Tammy, jumped at the sudden noise and all eyes turned behind them.

"Jeez you guys. You didn't have to slam the door." Jeremy said.

"Uh, Jer? I don't think anyone did that." Marcus put in, nervously.

"Uhh. You're jumping at shadows Marcus. The wind probably just blew it shut." said Anna.

"OK, if the wind shut it then why did it sound like it locked?" retorted Marcus

Tina teseted the door.
"He's right. The door must have slammed so hard that it broke. It won't open."

"You mean were locked in?" asked Jeremy "We can't be stuck here all night!"

Tammy smirked. "Are you going to be scared now? Look there's got to be a way out of this place, an open window, a secret passage..."

Everyone looked at her.

"Hey I'm rich and so was the owner of this place. We all have secret passageways."

"Well, we know we can't use the front door and we can't use this one so I vote that we explore and look for a way out at the same time." said Anna.

Everyone agreed, even Tina and Tammy.
And so, the exploring group ventured deeper into the factory, past the loading docks and through the storage area. Various crates and boxes seemed to be piled high, almost to the ceiling.

"It's like they had a bunch of stuff that they never even got rid of when the factory closed!" Jeremy said, looking up at the stacks of boxes with amazement. "I wonder why... you'd think someone would have at least come by..."

"Well, obviously, it's here because it didn't sell." Tammy rolled her eyes. "Duh! Anyone who knows about businesses knows THAT."

"Hey, how do you know that? For all we know there might have been some kind of accident here..." Anna piped up, glancing around nervously a bit.

The group eventually managed to navigate their way past the storage space, and emerged out onto a huge area filled with machines, and surrounded by catwalks.

"So this is where they made everything, huh?" Marcus hung back with the rest of the group, as he was a bit concerned about going near any of the machines in a place like this.
"Alright greenhorns, listen up. You three search down here while Tina and I search upstairs." We'll find a way out of here in no time, but you guys aren't leaving before we are." said Tammy as she straightened her white blouse.

She and Tina found a staircase and made their way upstairs, where they split up and went two different directions. Tina ended up in what looked to be a records room. The walls were lined with file cabinets, all covered with dust, with a single desk at the other end of the room. There was one item out of place sitting on the desk, a jack -in-the-box. Tina walked to the desk and examined the strange item. When she picked it up, the lid on the strange little toy sprang open and a wild gust of air rushed out of the box. Tina dropped the box and tried to back away, but without warning, an incredible suction pulled the snobby teenager into the box!

The lid snapped shut and the strange little toy rattled and shook as if something was trying to escape from it. Then almost as suddenly as it had started, the jack-in-the box stood still and the lid popped open once again. Out bounced a pair of spheres, each no bigger than baseballs. One was white and blue, matching the blouse and pants that Tina was wearing and the other was pink and blue, which were the colors that Tammy had on. The jack-in the box had been put there to trap the two girls and the one responsible had been very fast in his work.

Suddenly one of the filing cabinets opened and out jumped one of the oddest little creatures that ever could have been seen. It was about as tall as your average leprechaun, dressed in a mixture of black and white in a circus style coat and trousers. It was wearin a harlequin mask and a white jesters hat as well, which jingled a little as it picked up the two little balls and dropped them in a concealed pocket of his outfit.

"He he he. Now I can meet the rest of those children without these two butting in. Don't you worry my pretties." The little imp said as he patted his pocket. "I'll get to you in due time."
The remaining kids continued to explore the factory floor, browsing around and through the machines, hoping for at least some kind of sign that would guide them to an exit. The path they took ended up taking many twists and turns, and before they knew it they became quite lost.

"Hey, you know, shouldn't those other two be back by now?" Marcus asked, as he glanced behind him just in case they might be about to pop out and scare them. Of course, nothing was there, as he had had no idea what had actually happened to the girls...

"Ah, don't worry too much. I mean, for all we know, they could have just found the exit already and decided to leave ahead of us." Jeremy nodded in reply, still looking ahead. "Although, then why would there be an exit upstairs...?"

"Well, we need to keep looking!" Anna gently pushed Jeremy and Marcus forward, as the three of them advanced. She suddenly stopped, though, as she heard a muted laugh come from somewhere. "...hey. Did you guys hear that?" She looked around a bit, trying to discern its source, but she couldn't find anything.

"Hear what?" "Nope." were the replies from the boys, who looked at Anna like she had said something crazy.

"Are you sure? Because I just heard someone laugh, I think... and it didn't sound like Tammy or Tina..."
"You're right."

Anna was puzzled. "How do you know I'm right?" she asked Jeremy

"That wasn't me." He said.

"Right again."

The three kids looked towards the sound of the voice and found the little imp standing upside down on the ceiling!

All three kids took a step back in surprise.

"Who..who are you?" Marcus asked with remarkable courage.

"I'm the Spirit of Fun. You can call me Funzo, and I've been trapped in this grungy old warehouse for ever so long. It was no fun at all. I'm so glad you kids came to visit me."

"Well..uh we didn't realize that there was anyone here besides us." said Jeremy, still a little confused.

Funzo jumped down from the ceiling and landed on a crate.

"That's not surprising I guess. I can only come out when someone is here. If no one is here then I have no choice but to go to sleep." As he said this, the jesters cap on Funzo's head disappeared and a starry nightcap took it's place.

Annas' eyes grew big. "Wow, you must be magic!"

"Hahahaha. We'll,I wouldn't be much of a spirit if I wasn't. It's been such a long time since I've used my magic, and even longer since I had someone to play with. Would you three like to play with me?" he asked.

Anna, Marcus, and Jeremy looked at each other.

"Can we trust him? asked Marcus.
"Hard to say, he looks harmless enough." said Anna
"Come on guys, he can do magic. This could be cool." said Jeremy.

They turned back to Funzo.

"Ok, Mr. Funzo, What would you like to play?" asked Anna.

Funzo rubbed his hands together. "Oh I've got a great idea for a first game to play, but preparations must be made first."

With a snap of his fingers, and a brilliant flash of light, the kids found themselves standing side by side, frozen in place with their arms at their sides. Each of them had a long hose attached to their shirts, each of which led to a large pump which sat a few meters away with Funzo sitting on top of it.
"Okay!" Funzo clapped his hands together, looking at the three kids below hooked up to the pump. He grinned beneath the mask. "Here's how this'll work. I'm thinking of a number between one and eleventy billion. The winner gets something special! The others get a... surprise."

"Huh? What kind of game is this?!" Jeremy asked, tugging on the hose attached to his shirt, confused.

"And what the heck are these hoses for? What's the pump?" Marcus stared up at Funzo, not sure he wanted to trust the whimsical spirit.

"Ummm... thirty-two?" Anna actually ventured forth an answer instead of questioning her situation... and Funzo applauded her.

"Oh, well done, well DONE!" Funzo laughed with delight as he clapped. "We have a winner here!" Funzo turned his head in the boys' direction. "And as for the two of you, don't worry, you won't go away empty-handed... here's your consolation prize!" With that, the spirit hopped back off the pump handle, onto the pump's top, and pulled up the handle. Suddenly, Jeremy and Marcus were sucked into the hoses, and were seen traveling along their lengths all the way into the pump.

"H-hey! Hey! Mr. Funzo, what did you do with my brother and my friend?!" Anna gasped, as her hose fell loose.

"In... and out!" Funzo laughed, as he pushed the handle back the ground. A couple of smaller bulges were seen traveling back out of the pump and down the hoses... and suddenly, two small balls shot out of the hoses, ricocheting around the room and flying around, before bouncing into Funzo's hands. The two balls were colored in the coloration of the boy's clothes, and Funzo held them up. "Well, well, well! These two got to have a ball, I'd say..."

Anna gasped, trembling a bit as she saw what had apparently happened to her friends. "Y... you... what did you..."

"Don't worry, they're perfectly fine! Or they will be." Funzo said, as he stashed the two within his outfit right next to Tammy and Tina, before he made a congratulatory shout: "You can worry about them later - right now, YOU'RE the big winner!" As he made the proclamation, he flew up and off the pump down to the floor in front of Tina. "And now it's time for you to play a SPECIAL game... Come with me!"
The mischievous little gremlin leaped high into the air, nearly reaching the ceiling and plummeted down so hard that Anna was sure that he was going to leave a crater, but the poor girl didn't realize until too late that Funzo was going to land right on the plumger for the pump and with a mighty WHOOOSH, Anna felt an incredible blast of air escape from the hose attached to her! In seconds, Anna had gone from a svelte figure, to practically sumo wrestler size!

"Hehehe. Stop. Don't do that again. That tickles!" Anna giggled as she struggled against the hose that was stil stuck to her shirt. It was then that she realized that the air comming from the hose wasn't inflating her outfit at all! Rather her clothes were just stretching to accommodate their owners inflating body! Anna looked again. Her arms and legs had filled out into cone shaped appendages and were now sticking out at awkward angles, and her body itself had gained an egg-like shape.

"Well that's good to hear dear, so here we go again!"

Funzo sprang into the air again and Anna once again tried to escape, but at this point, she couldn't even reach the hose because her arms were too full of air to bend!

Whoooosh!

Once again, a wild blast of air was released and Anna swelled up even further. In one fell swoop, Annas bloated body over took her arms and legs, leaving her little more than a giant ball with a little head on top.
"Waahh... wha, what did you do to me?" Anna shouted, flapping her comparatively tiny hands. "I feel so full, and so big... and I can't even move!" Anna tried to step forward, but at her huge size and with the hose tethering her body in place, she just made herself wobble a bit. "H-help... Mr. Funzo, help me!"

"Oh, but I AM helping you, my air-filled friend!" Funzo somersaulted off the pump and landed behind Anna, before walking his way up the hose to where it connected to her back. "I'm helping you reach a new dimension of fun!" He laughed merrily, as he grabbed hold of the hose and hopped back, pulling it loose from Anna's body. "And now, it's time for the game!"

"What do you mean? Y-you mean that wasn't the game...?" Anna gasped a little bit as she tried to waddle forward, again to no avail.

"Of course not! I was just getting you prepared! Now, here's the game..." Funzo hopped up behind Anna, before giving her a shove, which caused her to roll forward rather quickly. "It's time for Anna Pinball! Once you get enough points, you get the most special surprise of all!"

"Oh!!" Anna's rolling catapulted her forward, and into an apparently different section of the factory. It seemed to be set up like a pinball field, and as she catapulted into one of the fixtures, it made a loud chime and lit up, before bouncing her away. She continued to ricochet around the manipulated field, making "eep!"s and "ah!"s as she continued to bank and bounce off the various makeshift bumpers and targets. A sign on the wall began to count up points rapidly, before reaching a total of 10,000,000. With that, all the fixtures darkened, and Anna was rolled towards an indent in the floor, which she settled into in an upright position.

"Mister Funzoooo... I feel... really dizzy..." Anna felt like her world was swirling around, and tried to regain her bearings.

"Congratulations! You won the game!" Funzo appeared in front of her, giving her a swift round of applause. "And now, as promised, here's your SPECIAL prize...!"

From underneath, Anna suddenly felt something rather pointy jab into her. She barely had time to gasp, before a loud POP emanated from her underside, and she shot up into the air, with air rapidly rushing out of a newly made hole in her underside...
Anna zipped snd zoomed around the room like a crazed insect before finally coming to a stop on the floor in front of Funzo. She looked like nothing more than a pile of laundry, every bit air had escaped from her body and she herself couldn't muster up the strength to move. In a sense, she was like a puppet whose strings had been cut as she lied there on the floor.

"Funzo had his hands clasped behind his back as he stooped over the girl. "Don't worry dear, you'll get another turn when the time comes, but for now let's keep you safe." The strange little figure rolled Anna up like a carpet and stuck her in one of his many pockets.

"I do believe that I've kept these two waiting long enough."

Funzo reached into a different pocket and pulled out the two balls that had once been Tina and Tammy. He attached two of the hoses from the giant pump to the balls and set them on the floor a few feet away. Then Funzo pulled out a miniature bicycle pump and attached the nozzle to the bigger pump.

"Travel size." he said to himself, and went to work. The air from the bicycle pump was multiplied tenfold after passing through the larger pump and then distributed evenly to the two tennis-ball shaped girls, and with every pump that Funzo made, they grew. First their size increased to that of baseballs, then basketballs, then exercise balls!

In no time at all, The two once manipulative and bratty teenagers had been reduced or rather increased to nothing more that a pair of giant two-tone spheres, each one was as wide and as tall as a monster truck tire. Any onlooker would be sure that one more pump would be enough to make the two spheres explode, but thankfully, this is where Funzo decided to stop.
"Now all I need is an audience." Funzo said and reached into his pocket and pulled out Anna. Her unrolled her out on the floor and grabbed her legs. Then with a shake like he was house cleaning, Anna popped back into shape.

"Ohhh, What the...Funzo! You little creep! Do you have any idea how much it stinks in there?!' Now for heavens sake....."

Anna had started to flail her arms around in exasperation when she suddenly brushed against something that stopped her cold. She turned around with out speaking and immediately recognized the twin spheres behind her.

© Copyright 2010 wraith, Another Other Person, (known as GROUP).
All rights reserved.
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