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Saturday, Dec. 28, 2024

11:36am EST

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Writing Blog Number 2

by S

Rated: 18+ · Book · Personal · #2311764

This is a continuation of my blogging here at WdC

This will be a blog for my writing, maybe with (too much) personal thrown in. I am hoping it will be a little more interactive, with me answering questions, helping out and whatnot. If it falls this year (2024), then I may stop the whole blogging thing, but that's all a "wait and see" scenario.

An index of topics can be found here: "Writing Blog No.2 Index"

Feel free to comment and interact.

Show Recent Comments

10 Most Recent Blog Comments:

Kåre เลียม Enga

32 minutes ago
In response to "20241228 Messages In Writing"

It's the same with setting. There's no need to dump everything on the first page. Or describing the main character in minute details ad nauseum.

Is Narnia Christian? If it's a great story well told, does it matter?

Kåre เลียม Enga

Dec 21, 2024 at 12:34am
In response to "20241221 Kudzu Plotting"

IMO Anne McCaffrey does this well with the parallel Dragonriders of Pern and Harper Hall trilogies. Adults-with-dragons; youth with fire-dragons. Memorable world building. Wonderful characters.

Kudzu the plant... only a curse for those who don't know its uses: forage, food, fiber.

Dec 19, 2024 at 7:09pm
In response to "20241219 'Misogyny' In Writing"

🐕GeminiGem🎁 - I chose Grease because it is so egregious and goes against everything Sandy had demonstrated up to that point. Dirty Dancing was set a few years later (early 60s), and, though Baby changes, it is gradual and is more a change of growing up, being true to herself. So, I think the time period can be used effectively without being so demeaning. As I see it.

🐕GeminiGem🎁

Dec 19, 2024 at 6:58pm
In response to "20241219 'Misogyny' In Writing"

I agree that when a woman changes herself to attract a man shows misogyny and is annoying...but...using the movie Grease as an example it an interesting choice. Yes, the lead female changes her appearance to appeal to the male. I think it was more because of peer pressure, but the peer pressure happened because of the pervasive misogyny of the peers. Interestingly, the male character does the exact same thing for the same reasons.

The movie is set in the 1950's, a time where the misogyny we see now is even waaaay worse. So, here is a thought. If you are writing about a time period like that and are showing social interactions of the characters, something like the pervasive misogyny is going to be true to the time and place the story takes place. Does that excuse it? No, of course not, but having present-day sensibilities in an era like that would make the story seem really off.

Kåre เลียม Enga

Dec 19, 2024 at 3:57am
In response to "20241219 'Misogyny' In Writing"

In my travels I try to connect with most everyone. I wonder what my stats would be... but many contacts have names whether human or not, whether the boss or 'servant' or guest.

In my writings...

thinking.

I do have characters without names.

SAD Holiday Potato

Dec 18, 2024 at 3:54pm
In response to "20241218 Children Characters"

As someone who is an Aunt to two children who have an age difference of four years, I can definitely tell you that they act completely different. Even though one of them is neurodivergent, the older one definitely acts more mature than the younger one.(also the older one has never tried to lick my feet.)

With very few exceptions, I've never had to tell an adult "stop eating my dress," "please don't lick me" or "stop pulling my hair," to anyone over the age of six. Yet within the last year or so I've had to tell my five year old niece these things repeatedly. She thinks this is hilarious.

Anyways, thanks for pointing out that kids aren't just miniature adults! I'll try to keep that in mind while writing.

Dec 18, 2024 at 6:44am
In response to "20241218 Children Characters"

Elisa: Snowman Stik - Writing about those who are neurodivergent is not something I feel I can talk about comfortably. I am trained as a teacher of those on the spectrum, and so I would not write a character in that regard because I do not feel it is my story to tell. But, yes, that last point may not apply to a child with developmental issues.

1 Like

Elisa: Snowman Stik

Dec 18, 2024 at 6:28am
In response to "20241218 Children Characters"

I am curious if there is wiggle room for the last point for child characters with developmental disabilities. (I do recognize this kind of character presents its own set of development pitfalls in terms of depicting the disability without stereotyping. That said, I think this can be a reasonable exception to the rule when done with care.)

1 Like

Dave Ryan

Dec 16, 2024 at 1:26am
In response to "20241216 Poor Characterisation"

There was once a variation of "compressed vice" in an original episode of Star Trek ("Who Mourns for Adonais?"), where a landing party of the usual suspects + one random never-seen-before-or-since female crew member are captured by the god Apollo and they turn the usually gruff Scotty into a simpering, love-struck puppy to try to introduce some conflict when Apollo puts the moves on her. Why they didn't just have Kirk horndogging it as usual I do not know - at least then everybody would have remained consistently in character. It looks like Scotty, it sounds like Scotty, but WTF?

1 Like

SAD Holiday Potato

Dec 14, 2024 at 3:41pm
In response to "20241214 Punk Genres"

This is interesting yet confusing. So basically it's like world building but with the word "punk" in there to make it sound cooler.
Maybe I misunderstand.

February 12, 2024 at 1:21am

#1064043

20240212 Types Of Love

Types Of Love

There are many, many types of love. And they should be utilised more in all aspects of writing.

This is an interesting topic, and is one that I actually did an essay on when I did my Bachelor of Arts (got a distinction, so it wasn’t terrible). Why should this be of interest? Because, in my experience, people who write about personal relationships tend to use two terms – love and friendship.

Well, there are a lot more than just those two.

The ancient Greeks had 8 different forms of love. Modern psychology has added a few extras to that list. And CS Lewis confused it all by condensing it to 4 and changing the definitions to suit his Christian-centric world-view; however, Lewis’ words have maintained some connection with people.

So, here is the list. The first 8 are the Greek ones, the following 4 are the newer additions. To be honest, there are around ten new additions, but most are simply nit-picking, splitting hairs sort of things, when they can really be covered by the Greek terms. So I took in my essay the four that really did not fit in with what the Greeks described.

Greek
1. Eros: This is physical love, sexual passion. There does not need to be an emotional component to this sort of love, though there may be. It can be coupled with other forms of love, however the attraction in Eros is physical at its core.
2. Philia: This is that strong, deep friendship that lasts through thick and thin. This is often experienced by those with shared upbringings or shared trauma. The people who share Philia have a deep connection mentally as well as emotionally.
3. Ludus: This is the friendship that is slightly less than Philia, but can also lead to more intense forms of love. The new love between a couple, the playfulness of a friendship group, children at play – this is where Ludus comes in. In Latin, ludus means “game” to show where the word led.
4. Agape: This is love for everyone, and can best be summed up by the term “empathy.” It is a universal sort of love, and involves not only acceptance, but also forgiveness and trust. The Greeks felt this was the ultimate in love, and the hardest to achieve.
5. Pragma This is the love that has lasted a long time. It has gone beyond Eros into being as one with the other person. Some consider this the act of staying in love, not falling in love or just being in love.
6. Philautia: This was the one many Greek philosophers considered the most important – love of oneself. In fact, the Greeks considered this the foundation of all other forms of love – how you love yourself is how you love others. Modern psychology takes a different tack, and it can be that those who dislike themselves are more affectionate towards others as a form of transference. If taken too far, the Greeks felt it become narcissism, which was a negative thing (and is now seen as a psychological disorder), but actual self-love is considered positive.
7. Storge: This is love for family. Not just family of blood, but those life-long friendships that have not passed over into another form of love, and are not born of Philia. However, even though there may be antagonism on the surface, the Greeks believed that family members shared Storge no matter what.
8. Mania: This was the negative form of love to ancient Greeks, and we would call it “toxic” today – an obsessive love. Nearly always unrequited, or if returned, done on one person’s terms only, it is when a person thinks another will ‘complete” them or make them “better”… or when they feel the pairing “needs” to be together. This is where stalking in all its myriad forms resides.
Extra
9. Paraphilia: This is a relatively modern form of love to be named, though it has existed for centuries. A Paraphilia is a love for something deemed unnatural. It could be harmless – a man who loves blue eyes to the extent he can only date a woman with blue eyes – or it could degenerate into something hideous or really unnatural. But it is a love that induces strong emotions in the person.
10. Zoophilia: While there are some negative associations with this term, this is a love of animals – including pets – beyond humans. It is not physical (that is bestiality, a paraphilia, although the DSM-5 equates the two, which is unfair), but it is deep-felt.
11. Hatred: This is an intense feeling of the absence of love towards something. Having said that, it is an emotion and it is adjacent to love, and the line between them is very thin. There is a reason the “enemies to lovers” trope exists.
12. Apathy: This is the opposite of love (and hate) in all its forms. It is a lack of emotion towards something or someone.

Same sex love used to be seen as a paraphilia (DSM-1, DSM-2 and DSM-3), but now is not even regarded as something to be mentioned separately when discussing love. In fact, as far as the Greeks were concerned, the forms of love they had applied to same-sex love as much as opposite-sex love.

Now, C.S.Lewis tried to mess it up in his attempts to Christianise the Western world. His book The Four Loves describes love forms thus:
1. Storge, a love based on empathy and dependency, as found in family
2. Philia, a love based on long-lasting friendship; he considered this the least natural
3. Eros, the romantic love bond of a sexual nature, with a mental connection as well
4. Agape, the unconditional love of God, and to which he felt all Christians should aspire
As can be seen, he took four of the Greek concepts and changed them based on his own brand of Christianity.

Anyway, ignore Lewis and his propaganda. There are many different forms of love that can make a relationship unique and stand out in a work of fiction, and an understanding of all of them could help make your characters really come to life.

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