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My thoughts released; a mind set free |
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These pages contain my thoughts, from meandering ideas and persuasions to deep cerebrations and serious mentations. Why, for what purpose? To release my mind and set creativity free. Somewhere inside the constraints of my mind dwells a writer, a poet, an artist who paints with words. In here I release those constraints and set the artist free. Perhaps, lost somewhere in the depths of thought, is a story or a poem, waiting to be written. 
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| In a recent comment I was reminded of what other people sometimes say without knowledge of the person they talk about. This was what I was facing many years ago. I quit high school after a bad, almost fatal accident. But, once I began to heal and had time to think, I decided that I would go back to school and finish. The situation was, however, I couldn't return to my hometown school because of the problems that lead me to quit in the first place. Back in those days, there was no open enrollment, so this created a problem. The solution was, I would stay with family friends in a small community who's school was willing to over look the resident situation. Changing schools in high school is tough, and to finish, I needed to be tougher. So, with an attitude adapted from my Dad, I handled the problems and completed high school. What was the attitude, and phrase my Dad used? "I don't give a rats ass what they think!" This type of an attitude soon resulted in many people talking about me, except for a few friends who actually knew me. Why didn't I try and change other peoples attitudes towards me? Because, for one, I was very introverted, and two, it meant most people just left me alone. After high school, I served some time in the military. Upon my discharge, I returned to the small town I had finished high school in only because my wife of the time insisted we live there. After time passed, we divorced, but since I had three teenagers I was now raising that had only attended the local school, I stayed for them. But, as the years passed, more and more of my fellow townspeople seemed to adopt an idea of me being anti social (introverts are), of having a temper (I do, and I do not like people infringing where they are not welcome), and being ruthless. This stemmed from certain individuals that thought they could bully me and/or my kids. There were even a few who didn't like how I lived and would start a fight. Let's just say that I don't like violence, but if someone starts something, I don't back down, either. I also will make a stand for what I believe in, even if it does result in someone else taking a pop at me. My Mom did try and teach me the "turn the other cheek" rule, but I never seemed to master that one. Being this way meant my share of fights, and being as stubborn as I am, it also meant that I may take a beating, but the other took worse. This, in time, resulted in most of the town believing I was someone best left to self, an idea I fully enjoyed and ensured would stick. Except for a few people I called friends, no body realized, or maybe refused to believe, I had a kind heart and was in fact just the opposite of the what was rumored. |
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I think I'd have to call a septic cleaner to flush out my brain after meeting Norb... I'd send you my muse, but I need it (?) more than you do right now. Best wishes for getting a good one!
